Ominous •adjective
Definition: being or exhibiting an omen: portentous; especially: foreboding or foreshadowing evil: inauspicious
Did you know?
"Ominous" didn't always mean "foreshadowing evil." If you look closely, you can see the "omen" in "ominous," which gave it the original meaning of "presaging events to come" -- whether good or bad. It is ultimately derived from the Latin word "omen," which is both an ancestor and a synonym of our "omen." Today, however, "ominous" tends to suggest a menacing or threatening aspect. Its synonyms "portentous" and "fateful" are used similarly, but "ominous" is the most menacing of the three. It implies an alarming character that foreshadows evil or disaster. "Portentous" suggests being frighteningly big or impressive, but seldom gives a definite forewarning of calamity. "Fateful" implies that something is of momentous or decisive importance.
It is close. The end of the year that presented so many ominous things to us. Death is not evil. I believe death of a loving member of your family can reveal peace. Peace from suffering, loneliness, unhappiness and pain. My mother's death, although was basically from surgery resulting from an injury, was a release from her suffering, loneliness and unhappiness. I miss her terribly, but I do not miss the sadness in her eyes.
Saturday was a busy day for ChemoSabe. He was up and out of the house at 4:30 a.m. He made it to the 6:00 a.m. opening of Penneys for their sales. Then to labs, in the office and back for his Velcade. Labs are just soaring. Everything looks extraordinary. Nothing ominous.
We are still having a problem with the weight gain. So much so, it is effecting his sleep and problems with acid reflux in the middle of the night. I think the bowl of cereal at bed time in the bed will need to cease.
Sunday started a gradual down slide from the steroids. The tiredness is evident. Yesterday I noticed a little of the snappishness. I tend to 'turn the other cheek', so to say. He realizes it when he says or does something that is unkind, rude, etc., so I don't respond as I realize it, too. You know me; sometimes it is the hardest thing for me not to come back with something.
We do not have any plans for New Years' Eve and really don't want to make any. I believe the appropriate and most laid back for us would be to rent a few movies. We have a good credit going as we rented four last weekend and turned them back in time to get a $2.00/each credit.
Medication advice -- If you have any inkling of the flu, sinus infection or any other respiratory ailments, tell you doctor you want Levaquin. This was the drug I borrowed from ChemoSabe's stash. It was left over from his bout with pneumonia the first of the year. I started it last Wednesday and Thursday I felt 50% better. I took another on Thursday and Friday, but not on Saturday. So, Sunday I was down in the mouth again. I took the last one last night and I really feel a lot better. My cough is just about gone...
I pray you all have a safe holiday. If you are partying, I pray you do it sensibly. It is better to go the expense and spend the night than to go the expense by the end result of a DWI. The cost may be greater than monetary. It could be some one's life.
I pray the new year will bring you happiness and good fortune along with a multitude of good health. If an illness strikes you, I hope in some way we have helped you with our journey. It will soon be two years. Without the help, support and encouragement from you and from ChemoSabe, I could not have withstood the pressure. I would have given in to my own selfish pity parties.
So remember, those ominous clouds may not be that bad after all. God always has a purpose.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Chemo Sabe
- ChemoSabe
- Benton, AR, United States
- Diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma-- May 2008
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Veracity -- Word for the Day -- Saturday, December 26, 2009
Veracity
Definition: Devotion to the truth: truthfulness: conformity with truth or fact:
something true
To keep up all veracity today I must confess, I STILL have not done any Christmas shopping. I have never waited so long. My mother and I usually had words beginning around the Thanksgiving holidays. She expected me to put up Christmas decorations in my house the day after. She would be gravely disappointed that I have none this year and she would really be dampened by the fact of the no shopping deal.
ChemoSabe began his meds last Tuesday (12/15). It was good that he traveled that week for two days. There were long days, too. With very little sleep he kept on trucking.
We made a Christmas gathering at our new neighbors house next door. The ones I adore. There were about 12 couples from our house down to the end of the culdesac. We got to meet people we only see in passing and were able to catch up with ones seen ever so often.
It has been a trying week. I have felt kinda scudsy and ChemoSabe has been crabby. Then his mom has been back with the hospital with a kidney problem. First the discussion was taking out the malfunctioning kidney and now they are going to do a stent to try to save it. It has been a rough couple of months for her since she is still recuperating from spinal surgery.
I have helped my brother get everything on Santa's list and now I am doing the wrapping along with items he has bought for his grand kids. I see all this stuff in my den floor and I think, "How do I get myself into these messes?!" But, then I have to be veracity about it and admit I will enjoy it in the end knowing I helped him through a difficult time.
It is over...all that worry about gifts and cooking and it wasn't important at all. ChemoSabe and I went out Tuesday evening and weathered the storm for some gifts. All but our own. Had to get off to work for Wednesday.
I had been fighting very dry insides all week. I don't get the regular flu stuff like stuffy nose and whatever. My sinuses dry up, my nasal passage and my throat gets so dry I choke on everything and cough. I put my 40+ yr old vaporizer on the dresser to spray over me and cram my nose and throat full of Vicks. No help.
Took some of ChemoSabe's meds on Wednesday night and I felt a lot better, but stayed in bed all day Thursday. I know...it was Christmas Eve. The floods dappered our efforts to get out except to find some cinnamon sticks.
I did bake some pies, chocolate oats cookies baked beans before I prepared the meatballs. I wanted everything so ChemoSabe could pop everything into the pots without me if necessary.
All went well. Had a surprise guest from Missouri we haven't seen in about ten years. Then the boss and wife came in, then little brother and Austin, then son and wife. We ate and stuffed ourselves and then ran my boss off with our karaoke. Way too much for him to handle.
ChemoSabe was up at 2:30 this morning so he could get ready for labs and Velcade. While he was out he did the 6:00 a.m. Penneys sale. He had fund and got a few bargains. Brought home my Christmas. Although I did cry last night and tell him I wanted nothing. He had given me everything with helping me with the house and letting us have it here anyway. He does so much for me.
We both have gained a lot of weight and I hope to get a handle on it quickly. He is off the steroids for the next two weeks, so maybe we can control it.
Labs came back very good today. Everything is above normal. He is doing great and we might even sneak in a ride before he has to head off to Atlanta again.
I still didn't put up lights or decorations. My mom would disown me! Not! It just didn't seems the same without her here to see them. She would always get excited about them. But, I don't have the hassle of taking them down and packing them again. The kids didn't even notice we had no tree.
I hope you all are well. Thank you for all the cards. We didn't send those out either this year. We just weren't into sending our newsletter.
Now it is time to say == Happy New Year -- Good night and Love -- Pepper
Definition: Devotion to the truth: truthfulness: conformity with truth or fact:
something true
To keep up all veracity today I must confess, I STILL have not done any Christmas shopping. I have never waited so long. My mother and I usually had words beginning around the Thanksgiving holidays. She expected me to put up Christmas decorations in my house the day after. She would be gravely disappointed that I have none this year and she would really be dampened by the fact of the no shopping deal.
ChemoSabe began his meds last Tuesday (12/15). It was good that he traveled that week for two days. There were long days, too. With very little sleep he kept on trucking.
We made a Christmas gathering at our new neighbors house next door. The ones I adore. There were about 12 couples from our house down to the end of the culdesac. We got to meet people we only see in passing and were able to catch up with ones seen ever so often.
It has been a trying week. I have felt kinda scudsy and ChemoSabe has been crabby. Then his mom has been back with the hospital with a kidney problem. First the discussion was taking out the malfunctioning kidney and now they are going to do a stent to try to save it. It has been a rough couple of months for her since she is still recuperating from spinal surgery.
I have helped my brother get everything on Santa's list and now I am doing the wrapping along with items he has bought for his grand kids. I see all this stuff in my den floor and I think, "How do I get myself into these messes?!" But, then I have to be veracity about it and admit I will enjoy it in the end knowing I helped him through a difficult time.
It is over...all that worry about gifts and cooking and it wasn't important at all. ChemoSabe and I went out Tuesday evening and weathered the storm for some gifts. All but our own. Had to get off to work for Wednesday.
I had been fighting very dry insides all week. I don't get the regular flu stuff like stuffy nose and whatever. My sinuses dry up, my nasal passage and my throat gets so dry I choke on everything and cough. I put my 40+ yr old vaporizer on the dresser to spray over me and cram my nose and throat full of Vicks. No help.
Took some of ChemoSabe's meds on Wednesday night and I felt a lot better, but stayed in bed all day Thursday. I know...it was Christmas Eve. The floods dappered our efforts to get out except to find some cinnamon sticks.
I did bake some pies, chocolate oats cookies baked beans before I prepared the meatballs. I wanted everything so ChemoSabe could pop everything into the pots without me if necessary.
All went well. Had a surprise guest from Missouri we haven't seen in about ten years. Then the boss and wife came in, then little brother and Austin, then son and wife. We ate and stuffed ourselves and then ran my boss off with our karaoke. Way too much for him to handle.
ChemoSabe was up at 2:30 this morning so he could get ready for labs and Velcade. While he was out he did the 6:00 a.m. Penneys sale. He had fund and got a few bargains. Brought home my Christmas. Although I did cry last night and tell him I wanted nothing. He had given me everything with helping me with the house and letting us have it here anyway. He does so much for me.
We both have gained a lot of weight and I hope to get a handle on it quickly. He is off the steroids for the next two weeks, so maybe we can control it.
Labs came back very good today. Everything is above normal. He is doing great and we might even sneak in a ride before he has to head off to Atlanta again.
I still didn't put up lights or decorations. My mom would disown me! Not! It just didn't seems the same without her here to see them. She would always get excited about them. But, I don't have the hassle of taking them down and packing them again. The kids didn't even notice we had no tree.
I hope you all are well. Thank you for all the cards. We didn't send those out either this year. We just weren't into sending our newsletter.
Now it is time to say == Happy New Year -- Good night and Love -- Pepper
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Cogitate -- Word for the Day -- Thursday, December 10, 2009
Cogitate
Definition: To think deeply or intently; to ponder; to meditate: To think about; to ponder on; to meditate upon; to plan or plot.
It is very hard for one to cogitate about another's feelings or ideas. Just when you think you have been with someone long enough something comes up that surprises you.
We have ALL known for some time that the journey for ChemoSabe would be endless. He knew it, I knew it and you ALL knew it.. I have shared with you my intermost doubts, concerns, hurts, fears, depression, joys and celebration throughout this process. Yet, little did I know how good news of a continued journey could effect ChemoSabe.
As you know, he has been off his chemo shots and steroids for three weeks...going on five because he doesn't start back until the 15th. In his heart he was hoping the doc would tell him there would be no more... The true realization hit him when she said, "2nd year maintenance to begin in March 2010 and you will be coming weekly for lower doses." Bless his heart... I did not know until he left town that it really burst his bubble... It has finally hit him that his treatments are a LIFE TIME deal or no deal.
We have to remind ourselves this journey is not like the flu... We will endlessly be alerting family, friends, acquiantance and such that he cannot kiss, hug, shake hands, or have much physical contact because of the immune system issues... It is lifetime. A few little doses of chemo and meds don't end the process. To me, that is the most discouraging and most realization of the matter.
So, even though we know the process, life still throws us curves if and when we cogitate long enough.
The good thing is the steroids will be one day a week and not four days straight. The Velcade will be a low dose every week and not a big dose every two weeks. Hopefully he will retain his energy and will not have the massive surges of energy and then the plummeting down of tiredness. In other words, I can forget my carpets being cleaned or things picked up around the house by him on those two weeks on! ha
It hurt me to hear his voice when he told me of his feelings... I wish there were some way I could wipe all this away with the twitch of my nose. The only thing I can do is keep his spirits up, because another year of maintenance doesn't mean we can't do what we have done all along. We are blessed he is able to continue on with work, hobbies and every day enjoyments. A lot of the folks with MM we have talked to in the last couple of months have filed disability, retired or just quit their lives altogether. If ChemoSabe did, I believe his faith, strength and attitude would falter greatly.
I just wanted to give you guys an update and to ask you to pray for his encouragement, continued good health, strength, stamina and faith. He is a good man.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Definition: To think deeply or intently; to ponder; to meditate: To think about; to ponder on; to meditate upon; to plan or plot.
It is very hard for one to cogitate about another's feelings or ideas. Just when you think you have been with someone long enough something comes up that surprises you.
We have ALL known for some time that the journey for ChemoSabe would be endless. He knew it, I knew it and you ALL knew it.. I have shared with you my intermost doubts, concerns, hurts, fears, depression, joys and celebration throughout this process. Yet, little did I know how good news of a continued journey could effect ChemoSabe.
As you know, he has been off his chemo shots and steroids for three weeks...going on five because he doesn't start back until the 15th. In his heart he was hoping the doc would tell him there would be no more... The true realization hit him when she said, "2nd year maintenance to begin in March 2010 and you will be coming weekly for lower doses." Bless his heart... I did not know until he left town that it really burst his bubble... It has finally hit him that his treatments are a LIFE TIME deal or no deal.
We have to remind ourselves this journey is not like the flu... We will endlessly be alerting family, friends, acquiantance and such that he cannot kiss, hug, shake hands, or have much physical contact because of the immune system issues... It is lifetime. A few little doses of chemo and meds don't end the process. To me, that is the most discouraging and most realization of the matter.
So, even though we know the process, life still throws us curves if and when we cogitate long enough.
The good thing is the steroids will be one day a week and not four days straight. The Velcade will be a low dose every week and not a big dose every two weeks. Hopefully he will retain his energy and will not have the massive surges of energy and then the plummeting down of tiredness. In other words, I can forget my carpets being cleaned or things picked up around the house by him on those two weeks on! ha
It hurt me to hear his voice when he told me of his feelings... I wish there were some way I could wipe all this away with the twitch of my nose. The only thing I can do is keep his spirits up, because another year of maintenance doesn't mean we can't do what we have done all along. We are blessed he is able to continue on with work, hobbies and every day enjoyments. A lot of the folks with MM we have talked to in the last couple of months have filed disability, retired or just quit their lives altogether. If ChemoSabe did, I believe his faith, strength and attitude would falter greatly.
I just wanted to give you guys an update and to ask you to pray for his encouragement, continued good health, strength, stamina and faith. He is a good man.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Lief -- Word for the Day -- Sunday, December 6, 2009
Lief
Definition: soon, gladly
I've been trying new designs for our blog...so if you don't like the colors, or if you are colored blind... let me know... I surely don't want you missing out on the news.
We have had an amazing week. One we will lief share with you. That is really an unusual word, but it is the one that popped up today.
I will begin by telling you I forgot to tell you a couple of weeks ago that ChemoSabe had four cancer spots removed from his face. He had a little wart like spot on the very end of his nose a few months back and our family doctor froze it off. It came back about a month ago and the day after his colonoscopy he was sent to a dermatologist and he burned it off. He found some other little cancer spots on his face and took them off, also. Now you ALL know how vain he is. But after what he has been through the last year he has changed.
That same day our MDO group was having Thanksgiving potluck. I had mentioned to ChemoSabe and a friend of ours that we use to have lunch EVERY day a few years back. No 'ifs', 'ands', or 'buts'... We made it every day... We have not done that in about ten years... Really not even had lunch together at all. I must have put a guilt trip on him without meaning to.. So, when I mentioned the MDO deal, he lief came. His face was all splotched, but he didn't act like it bothered him. We had a very pleasant meal. The spots came back okay and his face was back to normal in a few days after that black scab fell off the tip of his nose.
We made it through the labs, MRI, bone density and the dreaded bone marrow biopsy this week. We had our doctor's visit on Friday...she stayed with us from 1:45 to 2:30... She is an amazing doctor. Now, get your school notes out -- here we go.. See if you remember some of this stuff. Focus on the word 'unremarkable'... it means - nothing that stands out.
Report:
-- WBC - 3.85 (3.0-12.00)
-- RBC - 3.32 (4.50-6.00)
-- Platelet - 103 (150-500)
-- CRP (crap - ha) - <5.00 (0.00-10.00) remember, at times he was at 169
-- MRI - Stable unremarkable MRI of the brain without evidence of focal skull base or diploic myelomatous disease (this means he has no lesions or signs of cancer in his brain)
-- MRI - spine and pelvis -- Scans made of the cervical, thoracic and lumbar spines and pelvis. Stable hypointense homogeneous marrow with stable focal lesions. NO evidence of new focal lesion, compression or avascular necrosis is seen.. (this means he still has 25 lesions, but they have not grown. They are still evident at these sizes...1.5 cm in spine, 2 cm in spine, 2.5 cm in left sacrum 2 cm in the left ischium and other measuring and lesions. No lesions found in prosthesis is again noted. His artificial hip)
-- MRI - shoulders -- No focal lesions seen in either should area. Stable hypointense homogeneous marrow.
-- Bone Marrow specimens -- Aspirate: satisfactory -- Biopsy: satisfactory
The doc is still worried about the lesions not disappearing, but not gravely concerned. She is ordering another aspirate in March 2010. This is where they insert a needle into his back pelvic area and withdraw fluid from one of the lesions. The result is suppose to give her an indication, but it did not last March.He has not been on his routing in over three weeks. Due to business (work) constraints he cannot begin again until December 15. That puts us almost six weeks without the Dex or Velcade. She wasn't happy, but we had no choice. I wasn't happy either, but she believes it won't put us in the danger zone.
We begin the 2nd year Maintenance schedule in March 2010. Instead of the two weeks on/two weeks off, it will be weekly with one day of Velcade and one day of Dex.... It is suppose to be lighter doses, but for some reason being tied down to labs and meds like that weekly tends to put a crimp in your style. He goes to lab and then goes to work and when the labs come back he goes back up for the shot.
We did not ride in Toys for Tots today. It put a heavy burden on me and I think on ChemoSabe, too. We have been every year for the last five years. It was just too doggone cold. With him being off some of his meds, we were afraid the weather would put him down.
We did lief go to church and met the son and big E there. We both cried during the sermon. Our pastor is so good. He brings out the jerkers in you. That, along with big E sitting next to me, it was just more than I could handle. We are blessed.
We have been contemplating on whether we are getting a tree or not. I suppose I will put out our 9 ft. inflatable snowman and the carousel. I really don't have the energy to put lights out or to decorate a tree. I have been crying with each thought of my mother and my little brother. My little brother, because of his loss this year. He has done very well though. He put up his tree and let his granddaughter decorate it. He put up a few lights, too. We are doing Santa Claus lists this week, too.
ChemoSabe and I ventured out to Penneys after church. His closets are packed with dress shirts and pants (a closet for each). An envy of any man. BUT, he had to have two new shirts.. (I think he has some woman in him! ha). So, we went. While we were there we looked at pots and pans. I found a 13 piece copper bottom stainless steel set on sale for half price. We looked at about five different sets. He loves to cook, too. So, we decided on that set and brought it home. It would be mine for the Christmas tree (pretend tree).
The funniest part -- I headed over to the t-shirt section. We got t-shirts a few weeks back and they were the blended cotton instead of the heavy we usually get.. Too thin for me, but I don't wear them. I was looking at the sizes and I pulled out a package. They were the heavy blend. I said, "I really don't like the blended so I am getting this package for you.. Do you like the light blended?" No response. So I looked to my side and the man standing next to me was not ChemoSabe... I smiled and said, "Well, I guess you wouldn't know, would you?" Thank the Lord his cell phone rang then.
I emptied my nine year old pots/pans out of the cabinet and we unloaded the new ones... WE GOT THE WRONG SET. Same pots/pans, but 10 piece set... Of course, we had had to tear the box open. I hate that...but we couldn't get them out. So, for Christmas he will be getting me the pieces we missed... Might as well buy another set at the price you pay for individual pieces. I had to take my old big pots out and put them back into the cabinets, for now.
I love to cook in this weather. It is not uncommon for me to have something in the oven late in the evening each night. Tonight is my favorite and best pecan pie. It is called '72nd Street Pecan'. It is not made with karo syrup, but with pure maple syrup instead. Expensive, but lief worth it.
We have been spending some time with a couple I went to school with the last couple of weeks. The guy, I will call him 'Sambo' and I lived next to each other when I was in 1st and 2nd grade. The girl, I will call her 'Rosita' because her cheeks are rosy and smiles whenever she speaks. I went to junior high with her. They have been married for 41 years. They are such a joy to be with. It makes me feel like I am back in that era. We have laughed and shared our struggles.
Son came over yesterday and blew the leaves off our roof. Oh my!!! I believe there were more on the roof than in the yard. After he left we blew, mowed and burned leaves up to 7:00 p.m. It was like old times working in the yard together. It was a lot of work, but it was so refreshing.
We both shared some difficult situations with his doctor on Friday. Our Research nurse was in the meeting with us. I cried for about an hour. The nurse began to cry, too. I thought I was upsetting her, but she began to share her similar experience with us. Her husband was diagnosed with a rare cancer that is sometimes not detected until too late. It is a cancer that involves the muscles. They did surgery on him and now his right side from under his arm pit to below his waist and around his rib area is dead. He has not feeling of pain or any sensation. She even stayed and we shared after our doctor left.
At times, even when our doctor was present we would laugh out loudly. So, it was a cleansing experience for us. Since that time I have felt a relief. I have felt a pressure has been lifted. Our situation and circumstances have not changed. Even the reason for our crying has not changed, but it worked wonders to share. So to our Research nurse, Jeanie... thank you and we are praying for you.
Well, kids... my fingers are just about worn out. You are probably worn out from reading. Sambo---I hope I didn't make you cry.
Oh, yes, before I forget... WE ARE STILL IN 'REMISSION'!
AND, I just took ten shirts out of the dryer... Go Figure!
Good evening and Love -- Pepper "Go lief forth and rejoice to the Lord"... I really don't like that Word for the Day....
Definition: soon, gladly
I've been trying new designs for our blog...so if you don't like the colors, or if you are colored blind... let me know... I surely don't want you missing out on the news.
We have had an amazing week. One we will lief share with you. That is really an unusual word, but it is the one that popped up today.
I will begin by telling you I forgot to tell you a couple of weeks ago that ChemoSabe had four cancer spots removed from his face. He had a little wart like spot on the very end of his nose a few months back and our family doctor froze it off. It came back about a month ago and the day after his colonoscopy he was sent to a dermatologist and he burned it off. He found some other little cancer spots on his face and took them off, also. Now you ALL know how vain he is. But after what he has been through the last year he has changed.
That same day our MDO group was having Thanksgiving potluck. I had mentioned to ChemoSabe and a friend of ours that we use to have lunch EVERY day a few years back. No 'ifs', 'ands', or 'buts'... We made it every day... We have not done that in about ten years... Really not even had lunch together at all. I must have put a guilt trip on him without meaning to.. So, when I mentioned the MDO deal, he lief came. His face was all splotched, but he didn't act like it bothered him. We had a very pleasant meal. The spots came back okay and his face was back to normal in a few days after that black scab fell off the tip of his nose.
We made it through the labs, MRI, bone density and the dreaded bone marrow biopsy this week. We had our doctor's visit on Friday...she stayed with us from 1:45 to 2:30... She is an amazing doctor. Now, get your school notes out -- here we go.. See if you remember some of this stuff. Focus on the word 'unremarkable'... it means - nothing that stands out.
Report:
-- WBC - 3.85 (3.0-12.00)
-- RBC - 3.32 (4.50-6.00)
-- Platelet - 103 (150-500)
-- CRP (crap - ha) - <5.00 (0.00-10.00) remember, at times he was at 169
-- MRI - Stable unremarkable MRI of the brain without evidence of focal skull base or diploic myelomatous disease (this means he has no lesions or signs of cancer in his brain)
-- MRI - spine and pelvis -- Scans made of the cervical, thoracic and lumbar spines and pelvis. Stable hypointense homogeneous marrow with stable focal lesions. NO evidence of new focal lesion, compression or avascular necrosis is seen.. (this means he still has 25 lesions, but they have not grown. They are still evident at these sizes...1.5 cm in spine, 2 cm in spine, 2.5 cm in left sacrum 2 cm in the left ischium and other measuring and lesions. No lesions found in prosthesis is again noted. His artificial hip)
-- MRI - shoulders -- No focal lesions seen in either should area. Stable hypointense homogeneous marrow.
-- Bone Marrow specimens -- Aspirate: satisfactory -- Biopsy: satisfactory
The doc is still worried about the lesions not disappearing, but not gravely concerned. She is ordering another aspirate in March 2010. This is where they insert a needle into his back pelvic area and withdraw fluid from one of the lesions. The result is suppose to give her an indication, but it did not last March.He has not been on his routing in over three weeks. Due to business (work) constraints he cannot begin again until December 15. That puts us almost six weeks without the Dex or Velcade. She wasn't happy, but we had no choice. I wasn't happy either, but she believes it won't put us in the danger zone.
We begin the 2nd year Maintenance schedule in March 2010. Instead of the two weeks on/two weeks off, it will be weekly with one day of Velcade and one day of Dex.... It is suppose to be lighter doses, but for some reason being tied down to labs and meds like that weekly tends to put a crimp in your style. He goes to lab and then goes to work and when the labs come back he goes back up for the shot.
We did not ride in Toys for Tots today. It put a heavy burden on me and I think on ChemoSabe, too. We have been every year for the last five years. It was just too doggone cold. With him being off some of his meds, we were afraid the weather would put him down.
We did lief go to church and met the son and big E there. We both cried during the sermon. Our pastor is so good. He brings out the jerkers in you. That, along with big E sitting next to me, it was just more than I could handle. We are blessed.
We have been contemplating on whether we are getting a tree or not. I suppose I will put out our 9 ft. inflatable snowman and the carousel. I really don't have the energy to put lights out or to decorate a tree. I have been crying with each thought of my mother and my little brother. My little brother, because of his loss this year. He has done very well though. He put up his tree and let his granddaughter decorate it. He put up a few lights, too. We are doing Santa Claus lists this week, too.
ChemoSabe and I ventured out to Penneys after church. His closets are packed with dress shirts and pants (a closet for each). An envy of any man. BUT, he had to have two new shirts.. (I think he has some woman in him! ha). So, we went. While we were there we looked at pots and pans. I found a 13 piece copper bottom stainless steel set on sale for half price. We looked at about five different sets. He loves to cook, too. So, we decided on that set and brought it home. It would be mine for the Christmas tree (pretend tree).
The funniest part -- I headed over to the t-shirt section. We got t-shirts a few weeks back and they were the blended cotton instead of the heavy we usually get.. Too thin for me, but I don't wear them. I was looking at the sizes and I pulled out a package. They were the heavy blend. I said, "I really don't like the blended so I am getting this package for you.. Do you like the light blended?" No response. So I looked to my side and the man standing next to me was not ChemoSabe... I smiled and said, "Well, I guess you wouldn't know, would you?" Thank the Lord his cell phone rang then.
I emptied my nine year old pots/pans out of the cabinet and we unloaded the new ones... WE GOT THE WRONG SET. Same pots/pans, but 10 piece set... Of course, we had had to tear the box open. I hate that...but we couldn't get them out. So, for Christmas he will be getting me the pieces we missed... Might as well buy another set at the price you pay for individual pieces. I had to take my old big pots out and put them back into the cabinets, for now.
I love to cook in this weather. It is not uncommon for me to have something in the oven late in the evening each night. Tonight is my favorite and best pecan pie. It is called '72nd Street Pecan'. It is not made with karo syrup, but with pure maple syrup instead. Expensive, but lief worth it.
We have been spending some time with a couple I went to school with the last couple of weeks. The guy, I will call him 'Sambo' and I lived next to each other when I was in 1st and 2nd grade. The girl, I will call her 'Rosita' because her cheeks are rosy and smiles whenever she speaks. I went to junior high with her. They have been married for 41 years. They are such a joy to be with. It makes me feel like I am back in that era. We have laughed and shared our struggles.
Son came over yesterday and blew the leaves off our roof. Oh my!!! I believe there were more on the roof than in the yard. After he left we blew, mowed and burned leaves up to 7:00 p.m. It was like old times working in the yard together. It was a lot of work, but it was so refreshing.
We both shared some difficult situations with his doctor on Friday. Our Research nurse was in the meeting with us. I cried for about an hour. The nurse began to cry, too. I thought I was upsetting her, but she began to share her similar experience with us. Her husband was diagnosed with a rare cancer that is sometimes not detected until too late. It is a cancer that involves the muscles. They did surgery on him and now his right side from under his arm pit to below his waist and around his rib area is dead. He has not feeling of pain or any sensation. She even stayed and we shared after our doctor left.
At times, even when our doctor was present we would laugh out loudly. So, it was a cleansing experience for us. Since that time I have felt a relief. I have felt a pressure has been lifted. Our situation and circumstances have not changed. Even the reason for our crying has not changed, but it worked wonders to share. So to our Research nurse, Jeanie... thank you and we are praying for you.
Well, kids... my fingers are just about worn out. You are probably worn out from reading. Sambo---I hope I didn't make you cry.
Oh, yes, before I forget... WE ARE STILL IN 'REMISSION'!
AND, I just took ten shirts out of the dryer... Go Figure!
Good evening and Love -- Pepper "Go lief forth and rejoice to the Lord"... I really don't like that Word for the Day....
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Pundit -- Word for the Day -- Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Pundit -- noun
Definition: a learned person: teacher: authority, critic
Rain, Rain, go away....Come again some other day... I have too much to do. Have you finished up your Christmas shopping? I have not even started.
ChemoSabe finished up his tests yesterday with the MRI beginning at 6:30 p.m. He arrived home in time for a semi-warm dinner of oven fried chicken and baked sweet potato. Although he was still a bit sore from the biopsy you could not tell it by the way he ate.
We were early to bed as he needed to be up at 3:00 a.m. for a short trip to northern Arkansas. He made it...
As I was cleaning out my emails this morning I found a comment from someone on our blog dated September 2008. That's right -- 2008. It was from a young woman named Hilliary (aka Baldie)that had cancer. She was 27. I have sent her an email asking about her health... I hope I get a good response.
ChemoSabe ran into a doctor that visited with us a few times last year. He remember ChemoSabe's name and that we rode motorcycles. They had quite a conversation in the elevator. So, you see, this cancer thing does have some good experiences.
Oh, I lost my track.. I was speaking of the September 2008 issue the young lady commented on. I read that blog and then a few after that up to December 2008. As I read them the tears streamed down my face. How fortunate we have been. I remembered the people with MM that have been lost over the last year that we came in contact with. I remembered the ones we still keep in contact with and are doing quite well. We are them, also.
We are blessed that ChemoSabe continues to do well. It is an inconvenience for him to schedule his maintenance visits ever two weeks, get the labs, go for the testing and then follow-up with the doctor. It is troublesome to sort out the pills every night for the twice a day doses. It is a pain to have to run to the drug store for refills. It is a huge pain to have to call in a survey once a month for one of the drugs before it will be released... These pains are NOTHING compared to what could have been and what was for the ones not as fortunate as we. WE ARE BLESSED and Pundit.
You can rank yourselves up in the level of being pundit, also. You have learned so much from 'my' teachings in regard to this disease and the care giving. This is a disease that is controllable.
I often wondered why I never received an answer in the beginning when I kept asking, "What causes this?" "What did we do wrong in our lives to cause this?" Never once did the doctor's pretend to hear me. After many months of thought and prayer and a basic self beating upon my not so blond head anymore...the answer is "NOTHING". There is no answer.
What causes breast cancer, lung cancer, liver cancer, brain cancer. Can we prevent those? My biggest deal then was I wanted to put the blame on something. I felt if I could blame myself, ChemoSabe or someone else that it would go away. It doesn't and it won't.
I will be updating you again later this week on the big lab results and whether or not we have lost any lesions. There is a man staying at one of the cancer houses behind us that began his treatment about six months ago. He started out with 123 lesions. He now has only one... ChemoSabe started out with 25 and still has 25. The good news for him is that they have not grown... Please pray that the bone density and MRI shows shrinkage or disappearance.
Remember -- labs results are coming. Do you remember what the ranges are? I thought so... So, I will give you some help -- WBC (3-12), RBC (4.5-6), Platelets (150-500).
I love you all....
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Definition: a learned person: teacher: authority, critic
Rain, Rain, go away....Come again some other day... I have too much to do. Have you finished up your Christmas shopping? I have not even started.
ChemoSabe finished up his tests yesterday with the MRI beginning at 6:30 p.m. He arrived home in time for a semi-warm dinner of oven fried chicken and baked sweet potato. Although he was still a bit sore from the biopsy you could not tell it by the way he ate.
We were early to bed as he needed to be up at 3:00 a.m. for a short trip to northern Arkansas. He made it...
As I was cleaning out my emails this morning I found a comment from someone on our blog dated September 2008. That's right -- 2008. It was from a young woman named Hilliary (aka Baldie)that had cancer. She was 27. I have sent her an email asking about her health... I hope I get a good response.
ChemoSabe ran into a doctor that visited with us a few times last year. He remember ChemoSabe's name and that we rode motorcycles. They had quite a conversation in the elevator. So, you see, this cancer thing does have some good experiences.
Oh, I lost my track.. I was speaking of the September 2008 issue the young lady commented on. I read that blog and then a few after that up to December 2008. As I read them the tears streamed down my face. How fortunate we have been. I remembered the people with MM that have been lost over the last year that we came in contact with. I remembered the ones we still keep in contact with and are doing quite well. We are them, also.
We are blessed that ChemoSabe continues to do well. It is an inconvenience for him to schedule his maintenance visits ever two weeks, get the labs, go for the testing and then follow-up with the doctor. It is troublesome to sort out the pills every night for the twice a day doses. It is a pain to have to run to the drug store for refills. It is a huge pain to have to call in a survey once a month for one of the drugs before it will be released... These pains are NOTHING compared to what could have been and what was for the ones not as fortunate as we. WE ARE BLESSED and Pundit.
You can rank yourselves up in the level of being pundit, also. You have learned so much from 'my' teachings in regard to this disease and the care giving. This is a disease that is controllable.
I often wondered why I never received an answer in the beginning when I kept asking, "What causes this?" "What did we do wrong in our lives to cause this?" Never once did the doctor's pretend to hear me. After many months of thought and prayer and a basic self beating upon my not so blond head anymore...the answer is "NOTHING". There is no answer.
What causes breast cancer, lung cancer, liver cancer, brain cancer. Can we prevent those? My biggest deal then was I wanted to put the blame on something. I felt if I could blame myself, ChemoSabe or someone else that it would go away. It doesn't and it won't.
I will be updating you again later this week on the big lab results and whether or not we have lost any lesions. There is a man staying at one of the cancer houses behind us that began his treatment about six months ago. He started out with 123 lesions. He now has only one... ChemoSabe started out with 25 and still has 25. The good news for him is that they have not grown... Please pray that the bone density and MRI shows shrinkage or disappearance.
Remember -- labs results are coming. Do you remember what the ranges are? I thought so... So, I will give you some help -- WBC (3-12), RBC (4.5-6), Platelets (150-500).
I love you all....
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Disputatious -- Word for the Day -- Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Disputatious -- adjective
Definition: inclined to dispute; marked by disputation; provoking debate; controversial
My, my, my.. How many followers have I lost because I have been so lame in my writings? My last was November 6. Shame on me. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Well, we haven't been broke, in the health sense of the game so I haven't been trying to fix it in my blog.
We started this week off with labs yesterday. I have to say, they were pretty damn good. WBC looks tremendous. We received a print off today of about six pages. Either I have forgotten some of the lingo or they gave us a lot of stuff we haven't received before. A lot of hemo lingo. His CRP is <5... How low can you go, LIMBO?!?!? (I liked trying to do the limbo in my younger days...like 4 or 5)
We were at UAMS at the crack of dawn today. First up was the bone marrow biopsy. He did no lollipops this trip. Only an Activan to relax him. The tech today did him the last time and he never really winced. I believe she deadened him more in the pelvic after he told her he had gained 20 lb. since the last visit. It was over and we were out in about 15 minutes.
He was to have begun Velcade and Dex today, but with the testing and the doctor's appt. scheduled for Friday, we decided not to begin the two week process. He did check with the clinic after our decision and they agreed. We are getting too good at this.
It gave us some relief for the break, but it still lingers in the back of my mind..."if we slow down, will it speed up?"
We have done quite a bit of riding the last few weeks, but alone. We did a short trip to Heber Springs, Mountain View, Mount Magazine and then to Conway on Saturday to see our riding buddies that haven't been riding. Toys for Tots is this weekend and we always look forward to that. The forecast is 50 degrees.
ChemoSabe's mom gave us a scare. She went in for a routine epidural injection and ended up having spinal surgery. The surgeon informed us she may not walk again (15%). Three days later she is walking with no pain and is now home. Back to her disputatious ways. ha... Just had to use that word.
Thanksgiving was very difficult for my little brother. It was hard for me, so I can only imagine what he went through. But, he has bounced back this week and is putting up Christmas decorations and lights for his granddaughter. We are going shopping for her Santa this week. He has never Christmas shopped. We both might be disputatious before we leave the store. He has gotten a little hard headed.
I have not started any of our shopping. Please note: I say 'we'. I have one of those guys that pretends to know what we have gotten someone else when they open the gift from us. He smiles and usually takes the credit. But, I have to admit. If he bought the gifts I would probably be frowning as we don't agree on what to get individuals. I would probably have more of a shocked look on my face! ha
ChemoSabe has been feeling very well and seems to be back to his old self. If we get a movie or if he is watching the news in his recliner, he takes a loud nap. Like I said -- he seems to be back to his old self. To look at him, you could not believe he has gone through what he has the last year. A gift from God.
Well, I think I have caught you up a bit. I will try to do better. I haven't been sleeping in the spare room as much so I don't correspond much on my computer...
Good night and Love -- Pepper
Definition: inclined to dispute; marked by disputation; provoking debate; controversial
My, my, my.. How many followers have I lost because I have been so lame in my writings? My last was November 6. Shame on me. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Well, we haven't been broke, in the health sense of the game so I haven't been trying to fix it in my blog.
We started this week off with labs yesterday. I have to say, they were pretty damn good. WBC looks tremendous. We received a print off today of about six pages. Either I have forgotten some of the lingo or they gave us a lot of stuff we haven't received before. A lot of hemo lingo. His CRP is <5... How low can you go, LIMBO?!?!? (I liked trying to do the limbo in my younger days...like 4 or 5)
We were at UAMS at the crack of dawn today. First up was the bone marrow biopsy. He did no lollipops this trip. Only an Activan to relax him. The tech today did him the last time and he never really winced. I believe she deadened him more in the pelvic after he told her he had gained 20 lb. since the last visit. It was over and we were out in about 15 minutes.
He was to have begun Velcade and Dex today, but with the testing and the doctor's appt. scheduled for Friday, we decided not to begin the two week process. He did check with the clinic after our decision and they agreed. We are getting too good at this.
It gave us some relief for the break, but it still lingers in the back of my mind..."if we slow down, will it speed up?"
We have done quite a bit of riding the last few weeks, but alone. We did a short trip to Heber Springs, Mountain View, Mount Magazine and then to Conway on Saturday to see our riding buddies that haven't been riding. Toys for Tots is this weekend and we always look forward to that. The forecast is 50 degrees.
ChemoSabe's mom gave us a scare. She went in for a routine epidural injection and ended up having spinal surgery. The surgeon informed us she may not walk again (15%). Three days later she is walking with no pain and is now home. Back to her disputatious ways. ha... Just had to use that word.
Thanksgiving was very difficult for my little brother. It was hard for me, so I can only imagine what he went through. But, he has bounced back this week and is putting up Christmas decorations and lights for his granddaughter. We are going shopping for her Santa this week. He has never Christmas shopped. We both might be disputatious before we leave the store. He has gotten a little hard headed.
I have not started any of our shopping. Please note: I say 'we'. I have one of those guys that pretends to know what we have gotten someone else when they open the gift from us. He smiles and usually takes the credit. But, I have to admit. If he bought the gifts I would probably be frowning as we don't agree on what to get individuals. I would probably have more of a shocked look on my face! ha
ChemoSabe has been feeling very well and seems to be back to his old self. If we get a movie or if he is watching the news in his recliner, he takes a loud nap. Like I said -- he seems to be back to his old self. To look at him, you could not believe he has gone through what he has the last year. A gift from God.
Well, I think I have caught you up a bit. I will try to do better. I haven't been sleeping in the spare room as much so I don't correspond much on my computer...
Good night and Love -- Pepper
Friday, November 6, 2009
Nudnik -- Word for the Day -- Friday, November 6, 2009
Nudnik
Definition: a person who is a bore or nuisance
Oh my... what a word for the dictionary to select today. I don't know of too many individuals that fit in that category to me. I like to listen. Believe you me, I get some doozers in the office some times.
Today is my day off and I heard of yet another shooting in our nation. As soon as it came on the screen I turned it off. Choose to get in the shower with the three boys (Parker, Kipper and Pete). They were in dire need of a bath anyway.
I watched last evening the news of Ft. Hood. My son was born on a military base in Virginia 41 yr. ago. It was where I lived for two years. I felt safe. ChemoSabe and I took a vacation eight years ago and went back up there. It is such beautiful country. I wanted him to see Williamsburg, Virginia Beach and the places where I fished on the ocean while I was pregnant. When we got to the base I had already decided to give my sob story as to why we were there. To reminise. Well, we drove right onto base without even being stopped.
Our friends Rog and Ruthie were here this week for his follow-up testing and doctor's visit. They still out at Maumelle Park while they are here. His doctor's appointment today revealed his is still in remission. What a blessing.
We met them last night to eat fish and we were at the restaurant for 2-1/2 hours. I believe we shook the rafters at times with our laughter. We truly had an enjoyable evening. They will be back for another followup in March.
ChemoSabe's last day on Dex and Velcade was today. He has been up at 3:00 a.m. every day this week. He traveled to Shreveport yesterday and was there by 9:00 a.m. Drove in the driveway at 5:45 p.m. He had labs today and everything is looking good.
We talked last night about wishing treatments were over. We know there are some meds he will have to take the rest of his life. But, you know.. if we got word he could stop treatment and meds, we would have that fear in the back of our minds -- is it coming? We have talked to too many patients in the last year that had MM came back like a vengeance on them. ChemoSabe spoke with a patient in Infusion that had been off his meds for four years. Did the doctors take him off? No... he just felt so good he didn't feel the need to continue. It is massive now.
Our doctors have told us if one slows up or stops treatments, the MM thinks it has won. After the stem cell transplant, if you have any MM left, it hides and waits. It knows you will feel better. Then it jumps back on board and attacks more massively.
As I sit at my desk upstairs I hear the hammering of our neighbors getting a new roof. I hear and see the children playing on the corner. We have a great neighborhood for that and for walkers. Then I see a nudnik go speeding by down to the dead end. I would calculate he is going 40 in a 25.
Big E and his mommy are going to Mississippi tonight. That leaves son home alone. He already has plans for the weekend. He is still trying to sell his bike and I tried to get him to ride with us tomorrow, but I guess we are just too old for him to hang around with. OR, we are to fast paced. I believe it may be the later and he doesn't want to admit it.
Well, Children -- I have done nothing today but bathe the dogs and wash their blankets. So, I guess I need to get around and do something before Poppy comes home. I will work on being more informative on my blog.
Have a good evening, weekend and Love -- Pepper Try a little patience with the nudniks in your life.
Definition: a person who is a bore or nuisance
Oh my... what a word for the dictionary to select today. I don't know of too many individuals that fit in that category to me. I like to listen. Believe you me, I get some doozers in the office some times.
Today is my day off and I heard of yet another shooting in our nation. As soon as it came on the screen I turned it off. Choose to get in the shower with the three boys (Parker, Kipper and Pete). They were in dire need of a bath anyway.
I watched last evening the news of Ft. Hood. My son was born on a military base in Virginia 41 yr. ago. It was where I lived for two years. I felt safe. ChemoSabe and I took a vacation eight years ago and went back up there. It is such beautiful country. I wanted him to see Williamsburg, Virginia Beach and the places where I fished on the ocean while I was pregnant. When we got to the base I had already decided to give my sob story as to why we were there. To reminise. Well, we drove right onto base without even being stopped.
Our friends Rog and Ruthie were here this week for his follow-up testing and doctor's visit. They still out at Maumelle Park while they are here. His doctor's appointment today revealed his is still in remission. What a blessing.
We met them last night to eat fish and we were at the restaurant for 2-1/2 hours. I believe we shook the rafters at times with our laughter. We truly had an enjoyable evening. They will be back for another followup in March.
ChemoSabe's last day on Dex and Velcade was today. He has been up at 3:00 a.m. every day this week. He traveled to Shreveport yesterday and was there by 9:00 a.m. Drove in the driveway at 5:45 p.m. He had labs today and everything is looking good.
We talked last night about wishing treatments were over. We know there are some meds he will have to take the rest of his life. But, you know.. if we got word he could stop treatment and meds, we would have that fear in the back of our minds -- is it coming? We have talked to too many patients in the last year that had MM came back like a vengeance on them. ChemoSabe spoke with a patient in Infusion that had been off his meds for four years. Did the doctors take him off? No... he just felt so good he didn't feel the need to continue. It is massive now.
Our doctors have told us if one slows up or stops treatments, the MM thinks it has won. After the stem cell transplant, if you have any MM left, it hides and waits. It knows you will feel better. Then it jumps back on board and attacks more massively.
As I sit at my desk upstairs I hear the hammering of our neighbors getting a new roof. I hear and see the children playing on the corner. We have a great neighborhood for that and for walkers. Then I see a nudnik go speeding by down to the dead end. I would calculate he is going 40 in a 25.
Big E and his mommy are going to Mississippi tonight. That leaves son home alone. He already has plans for the weekend. He is still trying to sell his bike and I tried to get him to ride with us tomorrow, but I guess we are just too old for him to hang around with. OR, we are to fast paced. I believe it may be the later and he doesn't want to admit it.
Well, Children -- I have done nothing today but bathe the dogs and wash their blankets. So, I guess I need to get around and do something before Poppy comes home. I will work on being more informative on my blog.
Have a good evening, weekend and Love -- Pepper Try a little patience with the nudniks in your life.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Console - Word for the Day -- Thursday, November 5, 2009
Console (verb)
Definition: to alleviate the grief, sense of loss, or trouble of
Lord, I need your help today. Please guide me in the words, the wisdom, the compassion, strength and the honesty to share CheomSabe's experiences the last year with others.
I have been dealing with an individual at my work place facing brain and lung cancer. She began chemo treatments a few months back and radiation two weeks ago. She is going down hill fast. When I call to check on her the message machine says, "Please do not call me. I am too weak to take your call. Please leave a message." When we do talk, she is very open with me. I listen mostly. Her daughter comes in to the office and speaks with me also. She is already speaking of funeral arrangements. This is the same type cancers my sister-in-law was diagnosed with last October. She passed away in May.
Then we have a woman whose ex-husband is in the hospital with failing kidneys and he was diagnosed last week with Multiple Myeloma. They are wanting to give him a stem cell transplant immediately. I do not believe he has even had chemo yet. The daughters want to call me and tell me what the doctors are saying and want advise. His insurance won't pay for it.
Oh, my Lord....my honesty may be too much for these fragile situations. Please guide me in my response.
ChemoSabe has been up at 3:00 a.m. each morning this week. His labs are coming back in tremendous shape. Tomorrow is the last day for Dex and Velcade this week, then we are off for another two weeks. Remember, Velcade is the chemo shot..Dex is steroids.
I honestly do not know how this man keeps on trucking. He is in Shreveport today. He arrived there are 9:00 a.m. and will be back here by 6:00 p.m. It is a four hour drive. He won't spend the night anywhere. He has started up more jobs in the Louisiana area and we have joked about having to possibly move there. We then roll our eyes at each other, laugh and call out names loudly of those a move would affect. Mike, Tommy, Easton, Velta, Betty, Gordon, Teresa, Chaundell, Bud, Sandy... and the list goes on. Guess we could take them with us! NOT.... We are too old to move anyway.
His six month testing begins again on the 18th. He will have his first colonoscopy, followed by MRI, bone marrow biopsy and CT scan. We are hoping his 25 lesions have decreased in size this time around. Remember, his last tests showed he still has them, but they are not growing... Good that they aren't, bad that he still has them.
Holiday plans are in the works. Families are antsy about who is doing what and with whom. Time frames are already on a crunch. Tension is in the air. I won't be losing weight because of my eating, but that I will be stretching myself from one location to the other in equal amounts of time. Oh, if it were only that easy.
We are blessed that we have family.
My day off tomorrow is already full of plans. I don't care... I love this weather. I almost rode my bike to work today, but I think it would wrinkle my slacks too much to drape on the chaps. We will be heading out over the weekend.
Get ready for upcoming tests. I haven't given you one in quite some time. It will be loaded with questions. First one back with all the correct answers gets a round trip vacation to the Bahamas!! You are paying, of course.
Have a great day and Love -- Pepper (Thank you for listening. It was consoling)
Definition: to alleviate the grief, sense of loss, or trouble of
Lord, I need your help today. Please guide me in the words, the wisdom, the compassion, strength and the honesty to share CheomSabe's experiences the last year with others.
I have been dealing with an individual at my work place facing brain and lung cancer. She began chemo treatments a few months back and radiation two weeks ago. She is going down hill fast. When I call to check on her the message machine says, "Please do not call me. I am too weak to take your call. Please leave a message." When we do talk, she is very open with me. I listen mostly. Her daughter comes in to the office and speaks with me also. She is already speaking of funeral arrangements. This is the same type cancers my sister-in-law was diagnosed with last October. She passed away in May.
Then we have a woman whose ex-husband is in the hospital with failing kidneys and he was diagnosed last week with Multiple Myeloma. They are wanting to give him a stem cell transplant immediately. I do not believe he has even had chemo yet. The daughters want to call me and tell me what the doctors are saying and want advise. His insurance won't pay for it.
Oh, my Lord....my honesty may be too much for these fragile situations. Please guide me in my response.
ChemoSabe has been up at 3:00 a.m. each morning this week. His labs are coming back in tremendous shape. Tomorrow is the last day for Dex and Velcade this week, then we are off for another two weeks. Remember, Velcade is the chemo shot..Dex is steroids.
I honestly do not know how this man keeps on trucking. He is in Shreveport today. He arrived there are 9:00 a.m. and will be back here by 6:00 p.m. It is a four hour drive. He won't spend the night anywhere. He has started up more jobs in the Louisiana area and we have joked about having to possibly move there. We then roll our eyes at each other, laugh and call out names loudly of those a move would affect. Mike, Tommy, Easton, Velta, Betty, Gordon, Teresa, Chaundell, Bud, Sandy... and the list goes on. Guess we could take them with us! NOT.... We are too old to move anyway.
His six month testing begins again on the 18th. He will have his first colonoscopy, followed by MRI, bone marrow biopsy and CT scan. We are hoping his 25 lesions have decreased in size this time around. Remember, his last tests showed he still has them, but they are not growing... Good that they aren't, bad that he still has them.
Holiday plans are in the works. Families are antsy about who is doing what and with whom. Time frames are already on a crunch. Tension is in the air. I won't be losing weight because of my eating, but that I will be stretching myself from one location to the other in equal amounts of time. Oh, if it were only that easy.
We are blessed that we have family.
My day off tomorrow is already full of plans. I don't care... I love this weather. I almost rode my bike to work today, but I think it would wrinkle my slacks too much to drape on the chaps. We will be heading out over the weekend.
Get ready for upcoming tests. I haven't given you one in quite some time. It will be loaded with questions. First one back with all the correct answers gets a round trip vacation to the Bahamas!! You are paying, of course.
Have a great day and Love -- Pepper (Thank you for listening. It was consoling)
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
INVECTIVE -- Word for the Day -- Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Invective • \in-VEK-tiv\ • noun
Definition: an abusive expression or speech; insulting or abusive language
Wow -- this is the Word for the Day in the dictionary... BUT, I can do this!
I got the message last week when my aunt told me she really hadn't been looking at my posts, BUT she knew I hadn't written since October 5. No, she wasn't invective. In fact, I have never heard a bad word come out of her mouth. I ain't like her.
ChemoSabe began his two week on; two week of deal last Tuesday. I don't believe he has had as much energy as in the past. I know this because -- he hasn't vacuumed! Although his appetite has increased due to the steroids.
It has been a very busy month. Much of my days off on Fridays have been spent with my little (6 ft. 2 in. tall) brother. He is the disabled wheelchair. We have had some interesting visits. I work on his computer for him and he is becoming quite the guru with my teaching. I introduced him to Yahoo IM a few months back and he wears me out until around 10 p.m. on my BlackBerry. ChemoSabe smiles when he hears the Taco Bell bell I put on the IM notification for Mike.
We went out Friday and got him a used 1997 24 ft. travel trailer. We all use to camp a lot in the day. He misses it and wants to take his adopted granddaughter camping. So, I approved the purchase.
Saturday night, very late, he tripped on a blanket hanging off the bed and fractured his right femur. He has two hip replacements. The surgeons will be deciding on surgery or not. I will be giving him stomach blood thinner shots for 21 days. I was already giving him his arthritis shots every Monday. When I ask if he is in pain, he just shakes his head no and says he is a Marine.
ChemoSabe and I made a much needed relaxing bike trip to Mountain View last Saturday. The weather was beautiful. Since it is the end of the year we haven't been able to do anything the last four weekends because of his work. All work and no play makes Pepper grumpy.
I have been taking my frustrations out of rearranging and cleaning out the garage, mowing, blowing and burning two acres of leaves. Bathing and beating the dogs! (Not) And, a variety of other things. The biggest and most fun is throwing my own pity party. Then, I wonder why I am the only guest... ha
I did have reason to whimper when I assumed the position of a hood ornament on the back deck last week while blowing leaves. I had the back pack blower on my back and slid on a wet spot. Left leg went straight out to the left and right leg bent underneath the big rumpus with ankle in twisted position. Right wrist attempted to hold up the blower; left wrist banged wildly against upper deck to steady myself. All the while my cell phone was vibrating in my back pocket. If I don't answer, the caller attempts again... Guess that helped the immediate bruising on my buttocks as I came out of it with a lot of soreness for two days and no cuts or bruises. Hope my neighbor wasn't looking out the window as I was surely invective!
Do you ever hang around waiting for the other shoe to drop? Things haven't been too peachy keen, but hardly anything to complain about. We have the regulars like all those damn bills from UAMS (about a foot tall). Price of gas; those guys cutting in front of me at the I-430/I-30 split in the afternoon. So, life is good. ChemoSabe has an upcoming colonoscopy that I hope he doesn't cancel. He has already postponed it. He has never had one, but his cancer doc has demanded it before December. She actually told him it was suppose to have been done last March. So, that is weighing on our minds... I would die if anything comes up positive on it. I know he feels the same. Once your body hears that WORD, then he never forget the impact it has on your lives. Oh, how many times I have thought -- "I wish it was like before."
The Lord has been standing next to me all through my trials. He gives me strength. He is the only reason I have made it through all the hardships the last year. He picks me up, dusts me off and guides me into another day. Do you believe He does the same for you?
The end of the month ChemoSabe begins his testing again. The dreaded bone marrow biopsy, MRI and CT scans. Our next appointment is the first week of December. I remember writing back in May 2008 about such visits as the "Dreaded Visit". We have a much better feeling each time we go now. Our last visit I was actually running late because the doctor came in an hour early... It took me about 20 minutes to arrive and she and ChemoSabe were having a personal discussion. I couldn't believe she actually waited on me... We really like her..
I look forward to the afternoon now. I suppose this is my favorite time of the year. I get home in time to blow leaves out of the drive and off the decks. I feel the autumn smells crawling up my nose as the leaves are blowing over with the dampness. It reveals healthy foliage underneath which reminds me I will have more grass to mow in the summer.
The birds are burrowing down for the evening and you can hear the dogs in far off yards greeting their masters as they arrive home from work. Eager for attention and their evening meal.
I love to bake a pie in the middle of the week because it is cool outside. And, to build a fire in the hearth. I love this time of year.
Have a good evening and Love -- Pepper
Definition: an abusive expression or speech; insulting or abusive language
Wow -- this is the Word for the Day in the dictionary... BUT, I can do this!
I got the message last week when my aunt told me she really hadn't been looking at my posts, BUT she knew I hadn't written since October 5. No, she wasn't invective. In fact, I have never heard a bad word come out of her mouth. I ain't like her.
ChemoSabe began his two week on; two week of deal last Tuesday. I don't believe he has had as much energy as in the past. I know this because -- he hasn't vacuumed! Although his appetite has increased due to the steroids.
It has been a very busy month. Much of my days off on Fridays have been spent with my little (6 ft. 2 in. tall) brother. He is the disabled wheelchair. We have had some interesting visits. I work on his computer for him and he is becoming quite the guru with my teaching. I introduced him to Yahoo IM a few months back and he wears me out until around 10 p.m. on my BlackBerry. ChemoSabe smiles when he hears the Taco Bell bell I put on the IM notification for Mike.
We went out Friday and got him a used 1997 24 ft. travel trailer. We all use to camp a lot in the day. He misses it and wants to take his adopted granddaughter camping. So, I approved the purchase.
Saturday night, very late, he tripped on a blanket hanging off the bed and fractured his right femur. He has two hip replacements. The surgeons will be deciding on surgery or not. I will be giving him stomach blood thinner shots for 21 days. I was already giving him his arthritis shots every Monday. When I ask if he is in pain, he just shakes his head no and says he is a Marine.
ChemoSabe and I made a much needed relaxing bike trip to Mountain View last Saturday. The weather was beautiful. Since it is the end of the year we haven't been able to do anything the last four weekends because of his work. All work and no play makes Pepper grumpy.
I have been taking my frustrations out of rearranging and cleaning out the garage, mowing, blowing and burning two acres of leaves. Bathing and beating the dogs! (Not) And, a variety of other things. The biggest and most fun is throwing my own pity party. Then, I wonder why I am the only guest... ha
I did have reason to whimper when I assumed the position of a hood ornament on the back deck last week while blowing leaves. I had the back pack blower on my back and slid on a wet spot. Left leg went straight out to the left and right leg bent underneath the big rumpus with ankle in twisted position. Right wrist attempted to hold up the blower; left wrist banged wildly against upper deck to steady myself. All the while my cell phone was vibrating in my back pocket. If I don't answer, the caller attempts again... Guess that helped the immediate bruising on my buttocks as I came out of it with a lot of soreness for two days and no cuts or bruises. Hope my neighbor wasn't looking out the window as I was surely invective!
Do you ever hang around waiting for the other shoe to drop? Things haven't been too peachy keen, but hardly anything to complain about. We have the regulars like all those damn bills from UAMS (about a foot tall). Price of gas; those guys cutting in front of me at the I-430/I-30 split in the afternoon. So, life is good. ChemoSabe has an upcoming colonoscopy that I hope he doesn't cancel. He has already postponed it. He has never had one, but his cancer doc has demanded it before December. She actually told him it was suppose to have been done last March. So, that is weighing on our minds... I would die if anything comes up positive on it. I know he feels the same. Once your body hears that WORD, then he never forget the impact it has on your lives. Oh, how many times I have thought -- "I wish it was like before."
The Lord has been standing next to me all through my trials. He gives me strength. He is the only reason I have made it through all the hardships the last year. He picks me up, dusts me off and guides me into another day. Do you believe He does the same for you?
The end of the month ChemoSabe begins his testing again. The dreaded bone marrow biopsy, MRI and CT scans. Our next appointment is the first week of December. I remember writing back in May 2008 about such visits as the "Dreaded Visit". We have a much better feeling each time we go now. Our last visit I was actually running late because the doctor came in an hour early... It took me about 20 minutes to arrive and she and ChemoSabe were having a personal discussion. I couldn't believe she actually waited on me... We really like her..
I look forward to the afternoon now. I suppose this is my favorite time of the year. I get home in time to blow leaves out of the drive and off the decks. I feel the autumn smells crawling up my nose as the leaves are blowing over with the dampness. It reveals healthy foliage underneath which reminds me I will have more grass to mow in the summer.
The birds are burrowing down for the evening and you can hear the dogs in far off yards greeting their masters as they arrive home from work. Eager for attention and their evening meal.
I love to bake a pie in the middle of the week because it is cool outside. And, to build a fire in the hearth. I love this time of year.
Have a good evening and Love -- Pepper
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Cure -- Word for the Day -- Tuesday, November 3, 2009
CURE
Definition: recovery or relief from a disease; something (as a drug or treatment) that cures a disease; a course or period of treatment; a complete or permanent solution or remedy
I keep looking for the word - Cure
UAMS myeloma program gets cash
LITTLE ROCK — The University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences’ myeloma program is getting $19.5 million in federal research money over the next five years to continue its research into the causes of the cancer and develop new treatments.
This is the fourth time the UAMS Myeloma Institute for Research and Therapy has gotten the five-year grant from the National Cancer Institute, part of the National Institutes of Health.
The last grant, for $17.9 million, was awarded in 2004 and ended in June. The institute competes with research programs around the country for the funding.
“It’s very highly competitive,” said Dr. Elias Anaissie, professor of medicine in the UAMS College of Medicine and director of supportive care at the Myeloma Institute.
Myeloma is a cancer of the plasma cells, a type of white blood cell most commonly found in bone marrow. Myeloma affects a person’s ability to form new bone tissue.
Seventy-five percent of patients diagnosed with the cancer have symptoms such as bone pain in the back, pelvis, skull and long bones such as the thigh bone.
Ongoing research at the Little Rock institute examines development and progress of the disease and new individualized treatments.
“This grant enables us to focus all efforts toward the common goal of controlling and defeating multiple myeloma,” institute Director Dr. Bart Barlogie, a UAMS professor of medicine and pathology, said in a statement.
The American Cancer Society estimates that 20,580 new cases of multiple myeloma will be diagnosed this year, including 11,680 men and 8,900 women. An estimated 10,580 Americans died of the disease last year.
The Myeloma Institute, founded in 1989 by Barlogie, is part of the UAMS Winthrop P. Rockefeller Cancer Institute.
Since then, it has grown into one of the world’s largest centers for treatment and research into the disease, attracting patients from around the globe, Anaissie said. More than 2,250 patients are treated there each year.
Institute researchers have developed new treatment methods that they say are showing positive results. The median survival rate of patients at the institute is eight years, according to a UAMS news releaseWednesday. By comparison, the median survival rate of myeloma patients nationwide is about four years.
The five-year survival rate of patients at the UAMS institute is about 65 percent, compared with a 34 percent five-year survival rate nationwide, the institute says.
One study at the center, called Total Therapy 4, looks at tailoring treatment to patients based on the aggressiveness of their cancers.
UAMS researchers look at patients’ molecular genetics and categorize them as low-risk or high-risk depending on how quickly the cancer spreads and how well they’re predicted to respond to treatment.
“We basically do a riskadjusted treatment strategy,” Anaissie said.
Some patients are given smaller doses of chemotherapy but at more frequent intervals to reduce side effects while maintaining the treatment’s effectiveness.
“We’re looking at can we possibly achieve the same results but cut down the toxicity,” he said.
In a new study, researchers are examining whether a type of cell called a “natural killer cell” can be transplanted from a healthy person to a myeloma patient to help kill tumor cells.
Other studies are looking at the genetics of the disease and how myeloma cells grow and interact with other cells. Such data would give researchers valuable information that could lead to new treatments, Anaissie said.
“The overall theme is to try to understand the growth of multiple myeloma and the interaction of these cells within the environment in which they operate,” he said.
Definition: recovery or relief from a disease; something (as a drug or treatment) that cures a disease; a course or period of treatment; a complete or permanent solution or remedy
I keep looking for the word - Cure
UAMS myeloma program gets cash
LITTLE ROCK — The University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences’ myeloma program is getting $19.5 million in federal research money over the next five years to continue its research into the causes of the cancer and develop new treatments.
This is the fourth time the UAMS Myeloma Institute for Research and Therapy has gotten the five-year grant from the National Cancer Institute, part of the National Institutes of Health.
The last grant, for $17.9 million, was awarded in 2004 and ended in June. The institute competes with research programs around the country for the funding.
“It’s very highly competitive,” said Dr. Elias Anaissie, professor of medicine in the UAMS College of Medicine and director of supportive care at the Myeloma Institute.
Myeloma is a cancer of the plasma cells, a type of white blood cell most commonly found in bone marrow. Myeloma affects a person’s ability to form new bone tissue.
Seventy-five percent of patients diagnosed with the cancer have symptoms such as bone pain in the back, pelvis, skull and long bones such as the thigh bone.
Ongoing research at the Little Rock institute examines development and progress of the disease and new individualized treatments.
“This grant enables us to focus all efforts toward the common goal of controlling and defeating multiple myeloma,” institute Director Dr. Bart Barlogie, a UAMS professor of medicine and pathology, said in a statement.
The American Cancer Society estimates that 20,580 new cases of multiple myeloma will be diagnosed this year, including 11,680 men and 8,900 women. An estimated 10,580 Americans died of the disease last year.
The Myeloma Institute, founded in 1989 by Barlogie, is part of the UAMS Winthrop P. Rockefeller Cancer Institute.
Since then, it has grown into one of the world’s largest centers for treatment and research into the disease, attracting patients from around the globe, Anaissie said. More than 2,250 patients are treated there each year.
Institute researchers have developed new treatment methods that they say are showing positive results. The median survival rate of patients at the institute is eight years, according to a UAMS news releaseWednesday. By comparison, the median survival rate of myeloma patients nationwide is about four years.
The five-year survival rate of patients at the UAMS institute is about 65 percent, compared with a 34 percent five-year survival rate nationwide, the institute says.
One study at the center, called Total Therapy 4, looks at tailoring treatment to patients based on the aggressiveness of their cancers.
UAMS researchers look at patients’ molecular genetics and categorize them as low-risk or high-risk depending on how quickly the cancer spreads and how well they’re predicted to respond to treatment.
“We basically do a riskadjusted treatment strategy,” Anaissie said.
Some patients are given smaller doses of chemotherapy but at more frequent intervals to reduce side effects while maintaining the treatment’s effectiveness.
“We’re looking at can we possibly achieve the same results but cut down the toxicity,” he said.
In a new study, researchers are examining whether a type of cell called a “natural killer cell” can be transplanted from a healthy person to a myeloma patient to help kill tumor cells.
Other studies are looking at the genetics of the disease and how myeloma cells grow and interact with other cells. Such data would give researchers valuable information that could lead to new treatments, Anaissie said.
“The overall theme is to try to understand the growth of multiple myeloma and the interaction of these cells within the environment in which they operate,” he said.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Hope -- Word for the Day -- Thursday, October 15, 2009
Hope
Definition: 1 archaic : trust, reliance
2 a : desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment came in hopes of seeing you; also: expectation of fulfillment or success no hope of a cure b: someone or something on which hopes are centered c: something hoped for
I have hoped all week for the words to write and the opportune time to write them. It has come. ChemoSabe has travelled a lot this week. That is good because I haven't been a good companion. I have cried much of the week and have been having my own "Pity Party". Haven't really shared the reason.
Last year, this week, was when we were faced with my mom being in hospice. We were told she had about two days. We prayed she wouldn't pass on my younger brother's birthday, which is the 18th. Today, also, is when his wife was diagnosed with brain and lung cancer. She had brain surgery a year ago today. He lost his best friend on Valentine's Day (mom) and lost his most precious friend of 36 years in May on her 52th birthday (Sharon).
We have grown. We have laughed. We have endured. Then this week came around. We have cried.
ChemoSabe got home around 8:00 p.m. from Mississippi. Just in time to watch Grey's Anatomy with me and The Mentalist. We spoke about his day and he told me he wanted to share a miracle with me.
He has a client that has a five year old grandson. This young boy has grand mal seizures and has for a couple of years. It has caused him difficulty in school with friends, grades, etc. One night last week when he went to bed he asked his mother when the angels were coming back. Obviously she was confused and asked him more questions. He told her the angels came and rubbed all over his head the night before and it felt very good.
Since that evening, he has had no more seizures and the doctors cannot explain why. Isn't that a fabulous miracle? A miracle of hope for a young child and his experience with angels. Suddenly, my Pity Party didn't seem so important.
ChemoSabe is asleep. I hear him lightly snoring. All week I have had to push myself to keep the hope I have in my heart. To be able to focus on our lives down the road. I have found myself stepping away from him and losing my closeness because I'm afraid something will happen suddenly that will bring his health down again. I am selfish. I don't want to be hurt like that again.
BUT --- isn't it he that would be hurt. To have built that hope up and some little bug or something makes it come crashing down. He gives me strength. Strength through watching him work, do the things he enjoys doing (except mowing and weedeating). He continues on like live hasn't changed. And, I keep looking back wanting things the way they use to be.
Guess I am going to have to make a date with him to take me dancing. That is a way for us to get close... Whenever we were bored, had a spat, or just needed to rejuvenate, we would go out to dance.. We are the best on the floor... Yep -- that will be my hope. That we can find a safe decent place to do that.
We are on the two weeks off and will be back on the steroids and Velcade shots week after next.
Please pray for my brothers and me this week that we get over this sad hump. Everyone goes through it with a lost loved one, but we never have. If I could just touch her hand one more time.
When ChemoSabe came to bed he said, "You know, Millie watched over me today." That is what he called my mom. I have our two computer's screensavers set up with photos I have taken... There are loads. So when either computer is idle it takes you through our albums. He said when he sat down at his desk in our spare room this morning, there she sat waiting for him. He knew then she would be with him all day.
Good night and Love -- Pepper Keep your hopes up.
Definition: 1 archaic : trust, reliance
2 a : desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment came in hopes of seeing you; also: expectation of fulfillment or success no hope of a cure b: someone or something on which hopes are centered
I have hoped all week for the words to write and the opportune time to write them. It has come. ChemoSabe has travelled a lot this week. That is good because I haven't been a good companion. I have cried much of the week and have been having my own "Pity Party". Haven't really shared the reason.
Last year, this week, was when we were faced with my mom being in hospice. We were told she had about two days. We prayed she wouldn't pass on my younger brother's birthday, which is the 18th. Today, also, is when his wife was diagnosed with brain and lung cancer. She had brain surgery a year ago today. He lost his best friend on Valentine's Day (mom) and lost his most precious friend of 36 years in May on her 52th birthday (Sharon).
We have grown. We have laughed. We have endured. Then this week came around. We have cried.
ChemoSabe got home around 8:00 p.m. from Mississippi. Just in time to watch Grey's Anatomy with me and The Mentalist. We spoke about his day and he told me he wanted to share a miracle with me.
He has a client that has a five year old grandson. This young boy has grand mal seizures and has for a couple of years. It has caused him difficulty in school with friends, grades, etc. One night last week when he went to bed he asked his mother when the angels were coming back. Obviously she was confused and asked him more questions. He told her the angels came and rubbed all over his head the night before and it felt very good.
Since that evening, he has had no more seizures and the doctors cannot explain why. Isn't that a fabulous miracle? A miracle of hope for a young child and his experience with angels. Suddenly, my Pity Party didn't seem so important.
ChemoSabe is asleep. I hear him lightly snoring. All week I have had to push myself to keep the hope I have in my heart. To be able to focus on our lives down the road. I have found myself stepping away from him and losing my closeness because I'm afraid something will happen suddenly that will bring his health down again. I am selfish. I don't want to be hurt like that again.
BUT --- isn't it he that would be hurt. To have built that hope up and some little bug or something makes it come crashing down. He gives me strength. Strength through watching him work, do the things he enjoys doing (except mowing and weedeating). He continues on like live hasn't changed. And, I keep looking back wanting things the way they use to be.
Guess I am going to have to make a date with him to take me dancing. That is a way for us to get close... Whenever we were bored, had a spat, or just needed to rejuvenate, we would go out to dance.. We are the best on the floor... Yep -- that will be my hope. That we can find a safe decent place to do that.
We are on the two weeks off and will be back on the steroids and Velcade shots week after next.
Please pray for my brothers and me this week that we get over this sad hump. Everyone goes through it with a lost loved one, but we never have. If I could just touch her hand one more time.
When ChemoSabe came to bed he said, "You know, Millie watched over me today." That is what he called my mom. I have our two computer's screensavers set up with photos I have taken... There are loads. So when either computer is idle it takes you through our albums. He said when he sat down at his desk in our spare room this morning, there she sat waiting for him. He knew then she would be with him all day.
Good night and Love -- Pepper Keep your hopes up.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Multiple Myeloma -- Words for the Day -- Monday, October 5, 2009
Multiple myeloma is a cancer of plasma cells. Plasma cells are found in the bone marrow. Plasma cells produce a protein called antibodies. Some antibodies can attack and kill disease causing germs. Patients with this type of cancer may have low blood cell counts and immune problems giving them a higher chance for getting infections such as pneumonia. The bones can be affected leading to bone pain and breaks (fractures).
We deal with this realization every day. It is not foremost in our thinking, but it is always in the back of my mind.
We had a good weekend, but it ended with ChemoSabe being down all day Sunday and he stayed home today. He never calls in sick. He has a lot of pain in his chest and back. I am praying pneumonia is not setting in like before. He does not have congestion or the sniffles, but it still worries me.
We have had a busy past two weeks. We did make vacation the week of the 21st. We hauled the bikes up to Illinois to visit family (our favorite vacation spot). Since the weather was predicting rain we didn't want to take the chance of riding all the way. AND, ChemoSabe packed 12 T-shirts for the trip along with other items so it was good we took the Tahoe! ha
We rounded out our trip on Wednesday spending the night in Springfield, MO. We checked in around 9:00 at Drury Inn and got a room on the 4th floor. ChemoSabe grumbled about that, but hey...we were late. As we carried our clothes and bags in through the lobby, the desk clerk told us he had a cancellation and was putting us on the 1st floor at no extra cost. I thanked him and headed to the room.
It was a very nice room with a 40 in. flat screen. I noticed the adjoining room was open so I peaked in. It was a full size meeting room with a table for ten, another flat screen, a full kitchen, couch and chairs. I walked out into the hallway and it was the same room number as ours. I wanted to make certain there was no mistake. As we walked over to get a bite to eat before turning in I looked at the desk clerk with a thumbs up and said, "U da Man!"
Met up with Stretch and Rainman in Fayetteville on Thursday for the Bikes, Blues and BBQ festival. Over the weekend there was reported to be 300,000 people. We steered clear of the night life and the heavy traffic through the downtown area. We had good food and fellowship.
We were to return home on Sunday, but was looking so forward to getting home to our own bed and the kids. Commenced to load the bikes onto the trailer and ChemoSabe's foot got a little heavy. Dropped the beast off the back of the trailer and flipped the ramp off. STUCK!!! To the Rescue -- Rainman!
I was thankful for the time off away from work. We may not get another vacation for quite some time. It was good because last year we were dealing with the reality of Multiple Myeloma, the chemo treatments, stem cell transplant and of course, the battle of insurance issues. We are still dealing with the same issues, but we are better for the handling, this year.
I see how he feels now and I thank the Lord for the progress he has made. I couldn't survive without him.
Had the steroid treatment last week for four days and it begins again tomorrow with the two Velcade shots during the week. We have had discussions about his mood swings as a result and he is doing better. We have even laughed about it.
Labs are coming back very good each week. Weighs is progressing and we are working on that.
Well, I just got word from Tonto (his assistant) that he is at work. He just won't give in and rest. Please pray that I don't plow into him about taking care of himself. Sometimes he pushes me to my limit.
I will try to keep you posted more often. We have been taking advantage of the beautiful weather. Crisp mornings and fair days. I have even been leaving the kids out in the day time. Our new neighbors talk to them through the fence. Much different than the other ones that ran sticks up and down the wood and harassed. They were adults, too.
Have a good week --
Good day and Love -- Pepper
We deal with this realization every day. It is not foremost in our thinking, but it is always in the back of my mind.
We had a good weekend, but it ended with ChemoSabe being down all day Sunday and he stayed home today. He never calls in sick. He has a lot of pain in his chest and back. I am praying pneumonia is not setting in like before. He does not have congestion or the sniffles, but it still worries me.
We have had a busy past two weeks. We did make vacation the week of the 21st. We hauled the bikes up to Illinois to visit family (our favorite vacation spot). Since the weather was predicting rain we didn't want to take the chance of riding all the way. AND, ChemoSabe packed 12 T-shirts for the trip along with other items so it was good we took the Tahoe! ha
We rounded out our trip on Wednesday spending the night in Springfield, MO. We checked in around 9:00 at Drury Inn and got a room on the 4th floor. ChemoSabe grumbled about that, but hey...we were late. As we carried our clothes and bags in through the lobby, the desk clerk told us he had a cancellation and was putting us on the 1st floor at no extra cost. I thanked him and headed to the room.
It was a very nice room with a 40 in. flat screen. I noticed the adjoining room was open so I peaked in. It was a full size meeting room with a table for ten, another flat screen, a full kitchen, couch and chairs. I walked out into the hallway and it was the same room number as ours. I wanted to make certain there was no mistake. As we walked over to get a bite to eat before turning in I looked at the desk clerk with a thumbs up and said, "U da Man!"
Met up with Stretch and Rainman in Fayetteville on Thursday for the Bikes, Blues and BBQ festival. Over the weekend there was reported to be 300,000 people. We steered clear of the night life and the heavy traffic through the downtown area. We had good food and fellowship.
We were to return home on Sunday, but was looking so forward to getting home to our own bed and the kids. Commenced to load the bikes onto the trailer and ChemoSabe's foot got a little heavy. Dropped the beast off the back of the trailer and flipped the ramp off. STUCK!!! To the Rescue -- Rainman!
I was thankful for the time off away from work. We may not get another vacation for quite some time. It was good because last year we were dealing with the reality of Multiple Myeloma, the chemo treatments, stem cell transplant and of course, the battle of insurance issues. We are still dealing with the same issues, but we are better for the handling, this year.
I see how he feels now and I thank the Lord for the progress he has made. I couldn't survive without him.
Had the steroid treatment last week for four days and it begins again tomorrow with the two Velcade shots during the week. We have had discussions about his mood swings as a result and he is doing better. We have even laughed about it.
Labs are coming back very good each week. Weighs is progressing and we are working on that.
Well, I just got word from Tonto (his assistant) that he is at work. He just won't give in and rest. Please pray that I don't plow into him about taking care of himself. Sometimes he pushes me to my limit.
I will try to keep you posted more often. We have been taking advantage of the beautiful weather. Crisp mornings and fair days. I have even been leaving the kids out in the day time. Our new neighbors talk to them through the fence. Much different than the other ones that ran sticks up and down the wood and harassed. They were adults, too.
Have a good week --
Good day and Love -- Pepper
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Pink -- Word for the Day -- Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Pink • verb
Definition: to perforate in an ornamental pattern :to cut a saw-toothed edge on :pierce, stab :to wound by irony, criticism, or ridicule
Who wrote that last blog? It seemed all she did was pink away at ChemoSabe. Oh, excuse me -- It was I.
Since this is Wednesday I really can't fill you in on the mood swings. He has traveled the last two days and I found out around 1:00 he was out again this morning. I thought he was in the office... I have been sleeping on the couch, on the spare bed and on the floor. This was only last night. I feel the snoring this week is a result of fatigue.
Spirits have been good, although Woody got a good talking to and a finger in his bill. His communative sqawking didn't please ChemoSabe. It is something Woody does when 'daddy' gets home and is usually received in a good humor.
This is our week off Velcade and steroids. Next week will be, also. I am hoping for an uphill surge by week end.
We played WII again on Monday and we were having such a time we didn't hear son come in the door. He said it sounded like someone was really getting the ____ kicked out of them. It was me! Had to let him win again.
Good day and Love -- Pepper
Definition: to perforate in an ornamental pattern :to cut a saw-toothed edge on :pierce, stab :to wound by irony, criticism, or ridicule
Who wrote that last blog? It seemed all she did was pink away at ChemoSabe. Oh, excuse me -- It was I.
Since this is Wednesday I really can't fill you in on the mood swings. He has traveled the last two days and I found out around 1:00 he was out again this morning. I thought he was in the office... I have been sleeping on the couch, on the spare bed and on the floor. This was only last night. I feel the snoring this week is a result of fatigue.
Spirits have been good, although Woody got a good talking to and a finger in his bill. His communative sqawking didn't please ChemoSabe. It is something Woody does when 'daddy' gets home and is usually received in a good humor.
This is our week off Velcade and steroids. Next week will be, also. I am hoping for an uphill surge by week end.
We played WII again on Monday and we were having such a time we didn't hear son come in the door. He said it sounded like someone was really getting the ____ kicked out of them. It was me! Had to let him win again.
Good day and Love -- Pepper
Monday, September 14, 2009
Peregrination -- Word for the Day -- Monday, September 14, 2009
Peregrination • \pair-uh-gruh-NAY-shun\
Definition: an excursion especially on foot or to a foreign country: journey
We are continuing on our journey, but not on foot. It is not to a foreign country, but it has been foreign to say the least. As we continue on the peregrination, I find and see things I don't remember or that are not familiar. In speaking with ChemoSabe, he seems to have the same thought.
Please keep in mind -- the following is for medical purposes and to share what effects medications during Myeloma can cause. Anything I say or do in the following cannot be used against me! ha Seriously, as a caregiver, this prepares you for the patient's hardship, as well as, the caregiver.
We have been practicing what we heard from our pastor, Allan, about 12 years ago in a sermon. The 12 words you should say after a disagreement.. "I'm sorry; I was wrong; please forgive me; I love you." It is a MAJOR hurdle for me to get past the second word (sorry). That one is not in MY dictionary. And I am never wrong. ha
I carry a small pillow on my console in the Tahoe -- "I'm not bossy, I just have better ideas." That sums me up in a "nut shell". Some of you may think "nut case".
The last two weekends, even though we did peregrination to Eureka and Branson, have been a test for each of us. Mentally and emotionally for me and mentally, emotionally and physically for him. He claims it is the meds, but after speaking with him I believe it is the meds and the way he is pushing himself at work. After all, getting up at 1:30 a.m. and not getting home until 9:00 p.m. a few days last week, along with the steroids and chemo shots can take a toll. Would you not agree?
It has resulted in things said, actions and carrying feelings on one's sleeve. He actually antagonized me this weekend and then told me to "Shut up"... One thing we have never said out of our respect for each other. I have to tell you the hair raised on my neck. I could feel the razor edge going down my spine, so I repeated the same. Luckily we were in the truck because our friends were just a few feet away.. No, they did not hear. But, by the time we got to the restaurant, we were talking. By the time our food arrived, we were laughing and sharing with our friends about his moods. I DO believe in male menopause.
This week, I fear will be about the same even though there are no steroids or Velcade shots. He is travelling heavily again and is already tired. We did relax this afternoon and played four sets of tennis on the WII. He thinks he beat me. Heck, I had to do something to get me on his good side.
We went to our home church yesterday and it was like seeing family we hadn't seen in years. It was such a refueling. Something we have been needing. We knew what it was, but we have been so selfish in our time together. So fearful we would lose a precious moment for just the two of us. They hugged on us and loved on us, but especially, they listened and didn't condemn us for not being there.
We both have a busy week ahead of us. I have some major decisions to make in the next month or so. I just pray they are the right choices.
We are attending a Myeloma evening out this week. The very first one we attended was before ChemoSabe began his treatments last year. We met so many Myeloma friends there. I hope we see them again and meet new ones. (Well, not necessarily meet new Myeloma patients. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But, meet new friends that are going thru the same trials we have and will.)
It is late. ChemoSabe has been asleep since 9:00 p.m. to rest up for peregrination tomorrow. You know him...he won't spend the night out of town.
I hope you are have a good week.
Good night and Love -- Pepper
Definition: an excursion especially on foot or to a foreign country: journey
We are continuing on our journey, but not on foot. It is not to a foreign country, but it has been foreign to say the least. As we continue on the peregrination, I find and see things I don't remember or that are not familiar. In speaking with ChemoSabe, he seems to have the same thought.
Please keep in mind -- the following is for medical purposes and to share what effects medications during Myeloma can cause. Anything I say or do in the following cannot be used against me! ha Seriously, as a caregiver, this prepares you for the patient's hardship, as well as, the caregiver.
We have been practicing what we heard from our pastor, Allan, about 12 years ago in a sermon. The 12 words you should say after a disagreement.. "I'm sorry; I was wrong; please forgive me; I love you." It is a MAJOR hurdle for me to get past the second word (sorry). That one is not in MY dictionary. And I am never wrong. ha
I carry a small pillow on my console in the Tahoe -- "I'm not bossy, I just have better ideas." That sums me up in a "nut shell". Some of you may think "nut case".
The last two weekends, even though we did peregrination to Eureka and Branson, have been a test for each of us. Mentally and emotionally for me and mentally, emotionally and physically for him. He claims it is the meds, but after speaking with him I believe it is the meds and the way he is pushing himself at work. After all, getting up at 1:30 a.m. and not getting home until 9:00 p.m. a few days last week, along with the steroids and chemo shots can take a toll. Would you not agree?
It has resulted in things said, actions and carrying feelings on one's sleeve. He actually antagonized me this weekend and then told me to "Shut up"... One thing we have never said out of our respect for each other. I have to tell you the hair raised on my neck. I could feel the razor edge going down my spine, so I repeated the same. Luckily we were in the truck because our friends were just a few feet away.. No, they did not hear. But, by the time we got to the restaurant, we were talking. By the time our food arrived, we were laughing and sharing with our friends about his moods. I DO believe in male menopause.
This week, I fear will be about the same even though there are no steroids or Velcade shots. He is travelling heavily again and is already tired. We did relax this afternoon and played four sets of tennis on the WII. He thinks he beat me. Heck, I had to do something to get me on his good side.
We went to our home church yesterday and it was like seeing family we hadn't seen in years. It was such a refueling. Something we have been needing. We knew what it was, but we have been so selfish in our time together. So fearful we would lose a precious moment for just the two of us. They hugged on us and loved on us, but especially, they listened and didn't condemn us for not being there.
We both have a busy week ahead of us. I have some major decisions to make in the next month or so. I just pray they are the right choices.
We are attending a Myeloma evening out this week. The very first one we attended was before ChemoSabe began his treatments last year. We met so many Myeloma friends there. I hope we see them again and meet new ones. (Well, not necessarily meet new Myeloma patients. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But, meet new friends that are going thru the same trials we have and will.)
It is late. ChemoSabe has been asleep since 9:00 p.m. to rest up for peregrination tomorrow. You know him...he won't spend the night out of town.
I hope you are have a good week.
Good night and Love -- Pepper
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Ennead -- Word for the Day -- Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Ennead • \EN-ee-ad\ • noun
Definition: a group of nine
I have Webster dictionary as one of my favorites on the Internet. Since Yahoo doesn't feature a "Word for the Day" any more, I discovered today that Webster has it. So, here we go.
Ennead, meaning nine reminds me of the medication ChemoSabe is taking now. Ennead a day...in some form or fashion. Here they are:
B-6; Acyclovir; Rantidine; Gabapentin; Ecotrin; Tamaflu; Crestor; Velcade; Dexamethasone; Revilmid
The bulk of these are daily, twice a day. Yesterday began the second week of the 28 day cycle which means he started the Dex yesterday for four days. After Friday he will be off them for two weeks. Needless to say... he was up at 1:30 a.m. today and it is 8:00 p.m. and he still hasn't gotten home from work. He had to make a run to Ft. Smith for interviews.
We had a wonderful weekend alone. The rain chased us from the time we left the house on the bikes until the time we returned home. We got soaked once in between Berryville and Harrison for about five miles. Then, nothing.
ChemoSabe lost a guardian angel strap he had on his handlebars that his mom gave to him some years back. I thought I saw something come off his bike on the interstate, but by then it was too late. While we shopped in Branson we looked in every store for one. Even the Christian stores in Eureka had nothing to compare.
He also lost the lens cover to my very good camera. You see, he is still in training to take over my photo taking so he gets to carry that heavy thing, too. Well, to make a long story short....after eating lunch in Branson and shopping, we backtracked to the restaurant and sure enough they had the lens cover.
ANDDDDDDD...when we got home and pulled the bikes into the garage, then on the floor next to the Tahoe was his guardian angel. He was so happy.
Finished up our weekend with a visit to see my aunt and uncle from Bald Knob along with my cousin and spouse visiting from Indiana. It was too short a visit, but we had been so selfish with our travels over the weekend we missed out on family. We hope they forgive us.
Labs have been going very well. CRP is nothing.... Platelets were a little low last week (50), but now they are back up to 70.... He feels wonderful. Although, he did get a little crabby at times over the weekend after coming off the Dex on Friday. When that happened, we just kept our distance.
Had the worst food any restaurant could serve while we were in Eureka. Don't go to Sante Fe.... ChemoSabe and I went there before we got married -- 23 years ago. I tripped on a step and twisted my ankle and he had to carry me out... We have been there a few times over the years and the food was wonderful. We stopped in there a couple of months ago and they were getting ready for new management to reopen. I can tell you...they will be looking for another new management soon. Awful. And all we had was nachos. The beef tasted like dog food and looked like the Fancy Feast chunks.
Had the BEST BURGERS ever in Ft. Smith on Sunday. We stopped by big brother's house for a couple of hours and he fixed burgers on the grill. We had a very good visit, too. We will be back to spend the night with them in a couple of weeks.
ChemoSabe and I have really gained some more weight. The doctor keeps warning him about his. I keep warning myself about mine. We decided since he is getting up so early he could wake me up and we could walk the hood for about 30 minutes each morning. Well, he woke me up at 4:30 yesterday morning and I really wanted to get up, but he had snored all night and I was beat. We are still going to commit to it. Our neighborhood is a walkers' hood. It is very curvy, hilly and peaceful. With a lot of trees and a safe feeling. So, we ARE going to do it.
I look at him and he looks better to me each day. Although his face is puffy at times and flushed from the Dex, he looks healthy and happy. It is just hard to believe he has gone through the last year of all the meds and chemo. What a fighter!
Well, I am looking out our upstairs office and I see those familiar lights coming up the drive and I hear the kids yapping. My baby is home.
Good night and Love -- Pepper I will post updated photos, soon.
Definition: a group of nine
I have Webster dictionary as one of my favorites on the Internet. Since Yahoo doesn't feature a "Word for the Day" any more, I discovered today that Webster has it. So, here we go.
Ennead, meaning nine reminds me of the medication ChemoSabe is taking now. Ennead a day...in some form or fashion. Here they are:
B-6; Acyclovir; Rantidine; Gabapentin; Ecotrin; Tamaflu; Crestor; Velcade; Dexamethasone; Revilmid
The bulk of these are daily, twice a day. Yesterday began the second week of the 28 day cycle which means he started the Dex yesterday for four days. After Friday he will be off them for two weeks. Needless to say... he was up at 1:30 a.m. today and it is 8:00 p.m. and he still hasn't gotten home from work. He had to make a run to Ft. Smith for interviews.
We had a wonderful weekend alone. The rain chased us from the time we left the house on the bikes until the time we returned home. We got soaked once in between Berryville and Harrison for about five miles. Then, nothing.
ChemoSabe lost a guardian angel strap he had on his handlebars that his mom gave to him some years back. I thought I saw something come off his bike on the interstate, but by then it was too late. While we shopped in Branson we looked in every store for one. Even the Christian stores in Eureka had nothing to compare.
He also lost the lens cover to my very good camera. You see, he is still in training to take over my photo taking so he gets to carry that heavy thing, too. Well, to make a long story short....after eating lunch in Branson and shopping, we backtracked to the restaurant and sure enough they had the lens cover.
ANDDDDDDD...when we got home and pulled the bikes into the garage, then on the floor next to the Tahoe was his guardian angel. He was so happy.
Finished up our weekend with a visit to see my aunt and uncle from Bald Knob along with my cousin and spouse visiting from Indiana. It was too short a visit, but we had been so selfish with our travels over the weekend we missed out on family. We hope they forgive us.
Labs have been going very well. CRP is nothing.... Platelets were a little low last week (50), but now they are back up to 70.... He feels wonderful. Although, he did get a little crabby at times over the weekend after coming off the Dex on Friday. When that happened, we just kept our distance.
Had the worst food any restaurant could serve while we were in Eureka. Don't go to Sante Fe.... ChemoSabe and I went there before we got married -- 23 years ago. I tripped on a step and twisted my ankle and he had to carry me out... We have been there a few times over the years and the food was wonderful. We stopped in there a couple of months ago and they were getting ready for new management to reopen. I can tell you...they will be looking for another new management soon. Awful. And all we had was nachos. The beef tasted like dog food and looked like the Fancy Feast chunks.
Had the BEST BURGERS ever in Ft. Smith on Sunday. We stopped by big brother's house for a couple of hours and he fixed burgers on the grill. We had a very good visit, too. We will be back to spend the night with them in a couple of weeks.
ChemoSabe and I have really gained some more weight. The doctor keeps warning him about his. I keep warning myself about mine. We decided since he is getting up so early he could wake me up and we could walk the hood for about 30 minutes each morning. Well, he woke me up at 4:30 yesterday morning and I really wanted to get up, but he had snored all night and I was beat. We are still going to commit to it. Our neighborhood is a walkers' hood. It is very curvy, hilly and peaceful. With a lot of trees and a safe feeling. So, we ARE going to do it.
I look at him and he looks better to me each day. Although his face is puffy at times and flushed from the Dex, he looks healthy and happy. It is just hard to believe he has gone through the last year of all the meds and chemo. What a fighter!
Well, I am looking out our upstairs office and I see those familiar lights coming up the drive and I hear the kids yapping. My baby is home.
Good night and Love -- Pepper I will post updated photos, soon.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Locomotion -- Word for the Day -- Thursday, September 3, 2009
Locomotion
Definition: an act or the power of moving from place to place
What a whirlwind the last few weeks. Before you know it I will be writing "Merry Christmas and Happy New Year"!
Doctor's appointment for ChemoSabe on Tues., Aug 25 was good. Oh, Hell... it was awesome. All his labs are very good. His platelets were down a bit, but they are back up and running good this week. Weight was a topic. Bread, pasta, ice cream and all that good stuff.
MRI still shows those 25 lesions. The good news is: they are not growing. He will continue on the one year maintenance of which he has about four months left.
Doc wasn't too happy that he hasn't had a colonoscopy. She was insistent about it the last visit and he has not made an attempt to see our doctor about setting him up. It will be a requirement for the next visit which is December 3. I will keep you posted as I don't see this happening. He has never had one and swears he will never.....
He tried to get the steroids cut, but that was a no brainer.. So, he has been on them since Tuesday and tomorrow is the last day and we start again next Tuesday - Friday. Two weeks on -- two weeks off.
He is running like a locomotive. He has been getting up every morning this week around 1:00. Leaving the house no later than 5:30. Hmmm...I wonder if he has a girlfriend! ha
He is talking like a magpie. We usually talk once a day. Now we are talking at least three times a day and I can't get him off the phone. Going to bed or watching a good television show is disrupted by his talking. Last night I even left the room and he continued to talk as if I were still there. I came back in and pretended I had been listening the whole time.
That so reminds me of when my mom use to call. She loved talking to ChemoSabe. He could put the phone down and walk around the house and come back to the phone and she hadn't missed a breath. We still laugh about that. We had told her on occasion what we did and she didn't believe us.
We got that new roof on our house. Not the color I ordered, but that's another story. Got the new cover on our deck too. Took the old one off and put a metal one on. Now when the squirrels throw the hickor nuts down it sounds like a tree coming through the house.. Love it!! I can't wait to hear the rain.
We are iffy about travels over the holiday. Scattered thunderstorms are all in the forecast. I know I won't melt, but since ChemoSabe has hair now... Well, you know!
His hair has a lot of black in it and his eyebrows are mostly black. It is very healthy and thick. I got him a bottle of hairspray as he would use a bottle a week before MM. He doesn't use any now. Says he won't ever do that again. He is using the paste. Looks very goods.
With his energy, it puts a song in my mind that I can't get of. "Everybody's doin a brand new dance now .... Come on, Baby, do the locomotion." Now you know how old I am.
I am closing for now and I will get back with you sooner than later. Hope you all have a safe holiday. I am looking forward to the extra day even though I don't work on Friday.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Definition: an act or the power of moving from place to place
What a whirlwind the last few weeks. Before you know it I will be writing "Merry Christmas and Happy New Year"!
Doctor's appointment for ChemoSabe on Tues., Aug 25 was good. Oh, Hell... it was awesome. All his labs are very good. His platelets were down a bit, but they are back up and running good this week. Weight was a topic. Bread, pasta, ice cream and all that good stuff.
MRI still shows those 25 lesions. The good news is: they are not growing. He will continue on the one year maintenance of which he has about four months left.
Doc wasn't too happy that he hasn't had a colonoscopy. She was insistent about it the last visit and he has not made an attempt to see our doctor about setting him up. It will be a requirement for the next visit which is December 3. I will keep you posted as I don't see this happening. He has never had one and swears he will never.....
He tried to get the steroids cut, but that was a no brainer.. So, he has been on them since Tuesday and tomorrow is the last day and we start again next Tuesday - Friday. Two weeks on -- two weeks off.
He is running like a locomotive. He has been getting up every morning this week around 1:00. Leaving the house no later than 5:30. Hmmm...I wonder if he has a girlfriend! ha
He is talking like a magpie. We usually talk once a day. Now we are talking at least three times a day and I can't get him off the phone. Going to bed or watching a good television show is disrupted by his talking. Last night I even left the room and he continued to talk as if I were still there. I came back in and pretended I had been listening the whole time.
That so reminds me of when my mom use to call. She loved talking to ChemoSabe. He could put the phone down and walk around the house and come back to the phone and she hadn't missed a breath. We still laugh about that. We had told her on occasion what we did and she didn't believe us.
We got that new roof on our house. Not the color I ordered, but that's another story. Got the new cover on our deck too. Took the old one off and put a metal one on. Now when the squirrels throw the hickor nuts down it sounds like a tree coming through the house.. Love it!! I can't wait to hear the rain.
We are iffy about travels over the holiday. Scattered thunderstorms are all in the forecast. I know I won't melt, but since ChemoSabe has hair now... Well, you know!
His hair has a lot of black in it and his eyebrows are mostly black. It is very healthy and thick. I got him a bottle of hairspray as he would use a bottle a week before MM. He doesn't use any now. Says he won't ever do that again. He is using the paste. Looks very goods.
With his energy, it puts a song in my mind that I can't get of. "Everybody's doin a brand new dance now .... Come on, Baby, do the locomotion." Now you know how old I am.
I am closing for now and I will get back with you sooner than later. Hope you all have a safe holiday. I am looking forward to the extra day even though I don't work on Friday.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Monday, August 17, 2009
Withdrawal - Word for the Day -- Monday, August 17, 2009
Withdrawal
Definition: the act of taking back or away something that has been granted or possessed b : removal from a place of deposit or investment c (1) : the discontinuance of administration or use of a drug
BOOM!!!! Did you feel that? It is the bottom falling out of ChemoSabe.
I believe this has been the roughest withdrawal from steroids ChemoSabe has exhibited. He pushed and pushed himself last week and took advantage of the extra energy. He was out of town at least every day and he was up at 2:30 a.m. each day of the week. He topped it off with also going out of town on Saturday. He was to be home at noon, but called me at 2:30 p.m. and advised he would be home around 5:30 p.m. Momma (Pepper) wasn't happy.
Sunday wasn't much better. He may as well been out of town. He was either sleeping on the couch, bed or floor. His back was giving him fits. He claims he won't push as hard this week. Yeah, right!!! He doesn't have Dex this week nor for the next two weeks.
MRI is scheduled for much of the day Friday. We will have a follow up appointment with the doctor next Tuesday. Labs last week were outstanding. It won't do any good, but maybe there is some hope he won't have to be on meds in the near future. I wish that, but then I feel threatened by the possibility of the cancer returning if he isn't on some sort of maintenance.
We did get to ride on Thursday and Friday evening. Rainman bought a new bike and we met them both nights to eat. It is a bike like ChemoSabe's but three years newer (2008). It is a Kawasaki 2008 Vulcan 2000... One of the biggest bikes made. Purrs like a lion...
I hated to come to work today. I just didn't get enough rest. The Dex snoring has sent me to the spare bedroom the last three nights. The dogs have been restless, too. I was up at 2:00 a.m. letting them out. Parker was having a sugar attack and needed water. Maxie barks at Pete because he is rolled up in the sleeping bag and she can't find him. It is a zoo.
I will keep you posted on the rest of the week and what the withdrawals continue to bring to us. I have been doing a lot of spring cleaning.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Definition: the act of taking back or away something that has been granted or possessed b : removal from a place of deposit or investment c (1) : the discontinuance of administration or use of a drug
BOOM!!!! Did you feel that? It is the bottom falling out of ChemoSabe.
I believe this has been the roughest withdrawal from steroids ChemoSabe has exhibited. He pushed and pushed himself last week and took advantage of the extra energy. He was out of town at least every day and he was up at 2:30 a.m. each day of the week. He topped it off with also going out of town on Saturday. He was to be home at noon, but called me at 2:30 p.m. and advised he would be home around 5:30 p.m. Momma (Pepper) wasn't happy.
Sunday wasn't much better. He may as well been out of town. He was either sleeping on the couch, bed or floor. His back was giving him fits. He claims he won't push as hard this week. Yeah, right!!! He doesn't have Dex this week nor for the next two weeks.
MRI is scheduled for much of the day Friday. We will have a follow up appointment with the doctor next Tuesday. Labs last week were outstanding. It won't do any good, but maybe there is some hope he won't have to be on meds in the near future. I wish that, but then I feel threatened by the possibility of the cancer returning if he isn't on some sort of maintenance.
We did get to ride on Thursday and Friday evening. Rainman bought a new bike and we met them both nights to eat. It is a bike like ChemoSabe's but three years newer (2008). It is a Kawasaki 2008 Vulcan 2000... One of the biggest bikes made. Purrs like a lion...
I hated to come to work today. I just didn't get enough rest. The Dex snoring has sent me to the spare bedroom the last three nights. The dogs have been restless, too. I was up at 2:00 a.m. letting them out. Parker was having a sugar attack and needed water. Maxie barks at Pete because he is rolled up in the sleeping bag and she can't find him. It is a zoo.
I will keep you posted on the rest of the week and what the withdrawals continue to bring to us. I have been doing a lot of spring cleaning.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Thursday, August 13, 2009
MORE STAMINA -- Word for the Day -- Thursday, August 13, 2009
I NEED A BREAK! I am so thankful ChemoSabe is coming off the steroids Friday. He has absolutely talked my ears off this week... I laughed so hard last night I had to get a Kleenex to dry the tears from my face.
Remember, he only had about two hours sleep before traveling yesterday morning. He was gone all day and got home around 6:30 p.m. He called me when he was ten miles from the house to ask me about some chicken we had in the freezer and wanted to know if we could have it for dinner. I couldn't get him off the phone. I hung up and boom... he was in the driveway. Keep in mind, especially if you know him, he is not much of a talker, especially on the phone.
He loves the oven fried Banquet chicken. He claims it is like KFC. I put it in the oven and convinced him to lie down until it was ready. That would give me an hour break. WRONG!!! He talked, talked, talked. I laughed, laughed, laughed. He talked so much he even told me about one of his employee's tennis shoes. The employees are to wear black shoes and this guy had on some unusual shoes. ChemoSabe was explaining to him the dress code when another employee came out and informed him that she had given the male employee the shoes he had one. They were once hers. Since they weren't black she had taken a magic marker and colored in the mesh part of the tennis shoes to make them black. Only the white lower rubber part showed. ChemoSabe is going to donate this young man a pair of black boots.
He told other stories about more site visits he made. This is all in one day. Talk, talk, talk, talk... He was talking so fast, like he was on a stop watch and then he summed it all up by saying, "Baby, it was like being in a human zoo and you had to talk to them". "Some would open their gate and you would have to go in." That was the steroids talking. I lost it!
We ate our chicken along with macaroni and okra with tomatoes and a fresh pitcher of my magnificent tea. He told me it was a meal fit for a king. He was obviously starving.
That was the end of the evening. I fixed a cup of latte for my bed time drink; gave Parker his shot; put the other kids up and told him I was headed to bed at 8:00. We could finish up America's Got Talent in bed. NO SUCH LUCK!!!
ChemoSabe has two closets in my bathroom that houses his slacks, dress shirts and some novelty T-shirts. I heard rustling and then I saw shirts being piled on top of me. I started folding them and just wondered what was happening. He took out 30 shirts and 15 pairs of slacks. Some of these items I have not seen in years. He decided to give them away.
Was he exhausted after that, plus his travel all day? Lord, No... He said he felt exhilarated. He looked at me with his flushed cheeks and smiled and said, "Baby, we need to do that to your closets". I pulled the covers over my head.
I did convince him to come to bed. We talked more about the cancer food articles and he was talking 2% milk. I put my hand on his arm and told him that when God was ready for him, he would take him no matter what he was eating at the time. I said, "It's not like God is going to come down and see you with a carrot in your mouth and say, 'Nope, I'm not taking him this time, he's eating carrots.'"
We turned over, he told me to set the clock for 4:00 and he was up at 3:00 a.m.
ONE MORE DAY OF DEX!!!! HEEEELLLLLPPPPP! I am glad tomorrow is my day off and he is working!
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
p.s. Labs and Velcade today... Cross your fingers.
Remember, he only had about two hours sleep before traveling yesterday morning. He was gone all day and got home around 6:30 p.m. He called me when he was ten miles from the house to ask me about some chicken we had in the freezer and wanted to know if we could have it for dinner. I couldn't get him off the phone. I hung up and boom... he was in the driveway. Keep in mind, especially if you know him, he is not much of a talker, especially on the phone.
He loves the oven fried Banquet chicken. He claims it is like KFC. I put it in the oven and convinced him to lie down until it was ready. That would give me an hour break. WRONG!!! He talked, talked, talked. I laughed, laughed, laughed. He talked so much he even told me about one of his employee's tennis shoes. The employees are to wear black shoes and this guy had on some unusual shoes. ChemoSabe was explaining to him the dress code when another employee came out and informed him that she had given the male employee the shoes he had one. They were once hers. Since they weren't black she had taken a magic marker and colored in the mesh part of the tennis shoes to make them black. Only the white lower rubber part showed. ChemoSabe is going to donate this young man a pair of black boots.
He told other stories about more site visits he made. This is all in one day. Talk, talk, talk, talk... He was talking so fast, like he was on a stop watch and then he summed it all up by saying, "Baby, it was like being in a human zoo and you had to talk to them". "Some would open their gate and you would have to go in." That was the steroids talking. I lost it!
We ate our chicken along with macaroni and okra with tomatoes and a fresh pitcher of my magnificent tea. He told me it was a meal fit for a king. He was obviously starving.
That was the end of the evening. I fixed a cup of latte for my bed time drink; gave Parker his shot; put the other kids up and told him I was headed to bed at 8:00. We could finish up America's Got Talent in bed. NO SUCH LUCK!!!
ChemoSabe has two closets in my bathroom that houses his slacks, dress shirts and some novelty T-shirts. I heard rustling and then I saw shirts being piled on top of me. I started folding them and just wondered what was happening. He took out 30 shirts and 15 pairs of slacks. Some of these items I have not seen in years. He decided to give them away.
Was he exhausted after that, plus his travel all day? Lord, No... He said he felt exhilarated. He looked at me with his flushed cheeks and smiled and said, "Baby, we need to do that to your closets". I pulled the covers over my head.
I did convince him to come to bed. We talked more about the cancer food articles and he was talking 2% milk. I put my hand on his arm and told him that when God was ready for him, he would take him no matter what he was eating at the time. I said, "It's not like God is going to come down and see you with a carrot in your mouth and say, 'Nope, I'm not taking him this time, he's eating carrots.'"
We turned over, he told me to set the clock for 4:00 and he was up at 3:00 a.m.
ONE MORE DAY OF DEX!!!! HEEEELLLLLPPPPP! I am glad tomorrow is my day off and he is working!
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
p.s. Labs and Velcade today... Cross your fingers.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Stamina -- Word for the Day -- Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Stamina
Definition: staying power, endurance
I really don't know how ChemoSabe has kept up the last two weeks. It has to be the Dex that keeps him full of stamina. He was out of town yesterday and he didn't really get into bed until 11:00 p.m. He needed up at 3:30 a.m. He received a call around midnight and had to meet someone in his office... That is about 25 miles away from our house. He got back home at 2:30 a.m. Told me to get him up at 4:00 a.m. --- He was gone by 5:30 and is out of town all day today... Stamina... Last week was no different.
After Friday, he won't be on Dex again for two weeks. Maybe he can level out. He has labs tomorrow along with another Velcade shot. The shot should bring him down a little by Saturday. I am praying his labs will reveal good measures since he is working so many hours.
Oh.... since Monday, he is carrying two cell phones.. Double trouble! Thanks bunches to the one that made that possible. (Sarcasm)
The weekend has already been laid out for him. He will be out of town all day on Saturday... Hmmmmmmm, I wonder if some of my girlfriend's with bikes would like to go out for a while. I've never done that. ChemoSabe wanted to venture out on his bike Saturday to the job site, but it entails a lot of back highways and he would be leaving around 5:00 a.m. Too, too many deer out there for me. So, WE decided that wasn't a very good idea for him.
He has started to read some cancer articles the last couple of days. The one last night was based on the appropriate foods. After he went down the list I don't know how he would survive. He does all the wrong foods. Things he has done for years and things our doctor told us he could continue.
Milk -- He drinks a gallon of whole milk a week. Milk causes mucus to form in your esophagus and stomach lining. Cancer eats away at this mucus. Soy is suggested. Ugh...
Sugar -- His dentist had already advised him not to chew gum with sugar. He is a bubble gum freak on the bike. He eats a bowl of cereal every night, sugar in coffee, and the list goes on and on. I have been getting sugar free ice cream. It tastes like homemade...
Pork/Beef -- We had a pork loin Monday on the grill and then BBQ pork chops last night.
Those are only a few things.
ChemoSabe made two dozen oatmeal raisin cookies Monday night. They are just about all gone... I have had about five. When he is on Dex he likes to make those cookies.
You know... it doesn't really matter what we eat. When the Lord calls on us we could have a salad in our hand. Guess that why I have gained so much weight... You can tell I am living for the day! ha
Well, gotta run. I just wanted to give you a little update and hoping it won't be a "I told you so" if his labs come back bad and it is because he has so much stamina.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Definition: staying power, endurance
I really don't know how ChemoSabe has kept up the last two weeks. It has to be the Dex that keeps him full of stamina. He was out of town yesterday and he didn't really get into bed until 11:00 p.m. He needed up at 3:30 a.m. He received a call around midnight and had to meet someone in his office... That is about 25 miles away from our house. He got back home at 2:30 a.m. Told me to get him up at 4:00 a.m. --- He was gone by 5:30 and is out of town all day today... Stamina... Last week was no different.
After Friday, he won't be on Dex again for two weeks. Maybe he can level out. He has labs tomorrow along with another Velcade shot. The shot should bring him down a little by Saturday. I am praying his labs will reveal good measures since he is working so many hours.
Oh.... since Monday, he is carrying two cell phones.. Double trouble! Thanks bunches to the one that made that possible. (Sarcasm)
The weekend has already been laid out for him. He will be out of town all day on Saturday... Hmmmmmmm, I wonder if some of my girlfriend's with bikes would like to go out for a while. I've never done that. ChemoSabe wanted to venture out on his bike Saturday to the job site, but it entails a lot of back highways and he would be leaving around 5:00 a.m. Too, too many deer out there for me. So, WE decided that wasn't a very good idea for him.
He has started to read some cancer articles the last couple of days. The one last night was based on the appropriate foods. After he went down the list I don't know how he would survive. He does all the wrong foods. Things he has done for years and things our doctor told us he could continue.
Milk -- He drinks a gallon of whole milk a week. Milk causes mucus to form in your esophagus and stomach lining. Cancer eats away at this mucus. Soy is suggested. Ugh...
Sugar -- His dentist had already advised him not to chew gum with sugar. He is a bubble gum freak on the bike. He eats a bowl of cereal every night, sugar in coffee, and the list goes on and on. I have been getting sugar free ice cream. It tastes like homemade...
Pork/Beef -- We had a pork loin Monday on the grill and then BBQ pork chops last night.
Those are only a few things.
ChemoSabe made two dozen oatmeal raisin cookies Monday night. They are just about all gone... I have had about five. When he is on Dex he likes to make those cookies.
You know... it doesn't really matter what we eat. When the Lord calls on us we could have a salad in our hand. Guess that why I have gained so much weight... You can tell I am living for the day! ha
Well, gotta run. I just wanted to give you a little update and hoping it won't be a "I told you so" if his labs come back bad and it is because he has so much stamina.
Good afternoon and Love -- Pepper
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Deflated -- Word for the Day -- Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Deflated
Definition: to release air or gas from :to reduce in size, importance, or effectiveness :to reduce (a price level) or cause (a volume of credit) to contract intransitive verb :to lose firmness through or as if through the escape of contained gas
Well, well, Children -- How are you all doing? Such a short time and so much has been happening. Please continue to pray for Kenny Gray's family.
ChemoSabe made it through last week with the steroids beginning on Monday and ending on Thursday. Friday was a busy day for both of us. I will start with me first. After all, it is ALL ABOUT ME, isn't it?
Friday, my day off, I was on the computer by 7:00 a.m. seeing how important I was and if I received any emails and/or Facebook notifications. If I haven't told you lately, Facebook is the face of Satan. I really don't write on it, but a blurb now and then... I always tend to get into trouble. Some people just can't take a joke! OR, they just don't understand my personality.. Hey, you either love me or hate me.. ha.
Anyway, I most definitely HAD to mow, but by the time I got out into the yard it was already hot. I didn't pull the rider out, I just decided to rough it with my John Deere. I love that thing. It will climb a tree (self propelled rear wheels).
Every time I got into the groove I was interrupted. My neighbor came over and asked about ChemoSabe. They are our new neighbors (moved into the dog haters house). This couple is tremendous. Of course, she had to hug me. You know me -- I ain't a hugger. Especially with sweat running down my face and odor steaming away from my arm pits. But, she wouldn't take no for an answer. She is also helping me out with my mole holes. She claims she had the tool.
I finished up around 10:30, but that didn't include the weedeating and the dog yard. I would do that later. Called my little brother and got him out of bed. "I'm coming to mow!"... He grumbled and I hung up. He was waiting for me.
He has a Craftsman rider. Good little machine. I mowed from 11:00 a.m. to 2:30 a.m. with two little breaks. AND, I couldn't end the day without getting stuck. He climbed out of his hovaround and tried to push me out... Here we go -- The disabled pushing the dumb blond out of the mud joke. Can you picture that? The funnier sight was getting the 7 yr old granddaughter to drive while we pushed. Okay, enough of that.
On my way home I kept smelling something... I had sweated so much all day that my clothes soured. It sure ain't nothin like my Ralph Lauren or Obsession.
ChemoSabe was going to try to come home early and we were going after our trailer. So, I didn't change when I got home. Waited for two hours..... In the meantime, I washed the Tahoe. Neighbor came over again with the mole tool. Showed me how to use it. In fact, she did almost all the tunnels herself.
Have I mentioned, ChemoSabe gets crabby when he comes off Dex? (read between the lines). I can't take 'late' people. We didn't go after the trailer.
Okaaaaayyy... on to Saturday. We were going to meet Rainman and Stretch and take a good long, hot ride. Yes, we were up at 7:00 a.m. BUT, ChemoSabe had to fix his hair (yes, his hair is a lot longer), shine his boots, spit shine his sunglasses, etc. I am counting to 10.... You really have to understand that we don't argue about this. He would just get slower! ha
Finally, 8:45 and I am closing the garage door, getting on my bike. OMG... "Poppy, stop! Back up and get off your bike!" A 1/4 in. gap all the way around his back tire all the way down to the cord... Lucky it wasn't deflated... I was glad I wasn't getting there. Well, CRP! And I don't mean the lab CRP.
To make a long story short, we headed to Kawasaski and they just happen to have his tire in stock. We headed out again at 11:00 to meet our friends. The day was good, but not without more mishaps. We got home around 7:30 p.m.
It really was a wonderful day. We had an awesome dinner at Chili's and indulged in the white chocolate molten cake. We were overjoyed to see our friends after such a long haul.
Last Thursday, ChemoSabe took me to Butcher Shop for our 22nd anniversary... What an awesome meal with an awesome man. He just keeps on ticking. He brought me a huge bouquet of flowers by work Thursday morning. I don't know what looked the best -- the flowers or that big grin on his face. Wellllll... I guess the grin. ha
Dex started again today. The 'coming down' over the weekend just about got him. I believe that is why we rode so long. He thought he could beat it. Even though we got up late on Sunday (yes, we skipped church) and we were both aching in our major body parts, it didn't deflate us. We got a lot done, including picking up the trailer and changing out the tires on it. Even had time to go see the son...and sit under his new awning.
Dex really helped him today as he was up at 2:00 a.m. and outta here by 4:30. He has another long day tomorrow. He couldn't make it without Tonto in the office. Tonto is his admin girl.
Well, you have probably heard enough out of me today. You would think I am on Dex. Please continue to be in prayer with Kenny's wife and family. I will keep you posted and GET READY FOR YOUR TEST. The labs have been looking good the last two weeks.
Good evening and Love -- Pepper
Definition: to release air or gas from
Well, well, Children -- How are you all doing? Such a short time and so much has been happening. Please continue to pray for Kenny Gray's family.
ChemoSabe made it through last week with the steroids beginning on Monday and ending on Thursday. Friday was a busy day for both of us. I will start with me first. After all, it is ALL ABOUT ME, isn't it?
Friday, my day off, I was on the computer by 7:00 a.m. seeing how important I was and if I received any emails and/or Facebook notifications. If I haven't told you lately, Facebook is the face of Satan. I really don't write on it, but a blurb now and then... I always tend to get into trouble. Some people just can't take a joke! OR, they just don't understand my personality.. Hey, you either love me or hate me.. ha.
Anyway, I most definitely HAD to mow, but by the time I got out into the yard it was already hot. I didn't pull the rider out, I just decided to rough it with my John Deere. I love that thing. It will climb a tree (self propelled rear wheels).
Every time I got into the groove I was interrupted. My neighbor came over and asked about ChemoSabe. They are our new neighbors (moved into the dog haters house). This couple is tremendous. Of course, she had to hug me. You know me -- I ain't a hugger. Especially with sweat running down my face and odor steaming away from my arm pits. But, she wouldn't take no for an answer. She is also helping me out with my mole holes. She claims she had the tool.
I finished up around 10:30, but that didn't include the weedeating and the dog yard. I would do that later. Called my little brother and got him out of bed. "I'm coming to mow!"... He grumbled and I hung up. He was waiting for me.
He has a Craftsman rider. Good little machine. I mowed from 11:00 a.m. to 2:30 a.m. with two little breaks. AND, I couldn't end the day without getting stuck. He climbed out of his hovaround and tried to push me out... Here we go -- The disabled pushing the dumb blond out of the mud joke. Can you picture that? The funnier sight was getting the 7 yr old granddaughter to drive while we pushed. Okay, enough of that.
On my way home I kept smelling something... I had sweated so much all day that my clothes soured. It sure ain't nothin like my Ralph Lauren or Obsession.
ChemoSabe was going to try to come home early and we were going after our trailer. So, I didn't change when I got home. Waited for two hours..... In the meantime, I washed the Tahoe. Neighbor came over again with the mole tool. Showed me how to use it. In fact, she did almost all the tunnels herself.
Have I mentioned, ChemoSabe gets crabby when he comes off Dex? (read between the lines). I can't take 'late' people. We didn't go after the trailer.
Okaaaaayyy... on to Saturday. We were going to meet Rainman and Stretch and take a good long, hot ride. Yes, we were up at 7:00 a.m. BUT, ChemoSabe had to fix his hair (yes, his hair is a lot longer), shine his boots, spit shine his sunglasses, etc. I am counting to 10.... You really have to understand that we don't argue about this. He would just get slower! ha
Finally, 8:45 and I am closing the garage door, getting on my bike. OMG... "Poppy, stop! Back up and get off your bike!" A 1/4 in. gap all the way around his back tire all the way down to the cord... Lucky it wasn't deflated... I was glad I wasn't getting there. Well, CRP! And I don't mean the lab CRP.
To make a long story short, we headed to Kawasaski and they just happen to have his tire in stock. We headed out again at 11:00 to meet our friends. The day was good, but not without more mishaps. We got home around 7:30 p.m.
It really was a wonderful day. We had an awesome dinner at Chili's and indulged in the white chocolate molten cake. We were overjoyed to see our friends after such a long haul.
Last Thursday, ChemoSabe took me to Butcher Shop for our 22nd anniversary... What an awesome meal with an awesome man. He just keeps on ticking. He brought me a huge bouquet of flowers by work Thursday morning. I don't know what looked the best -- the flowers or that big grin on his face. Wellllll... I guess the grin. ha
Dex started again today. The 'coming down' over the weekend just about got him. I believe that is why we rode so long. He thought he could beat it. Even though we got up late on Sunday (yes, we skipped church) and we were both aching in our major body parts, it didn't deflate us. We got a lot done, including picking up the trailer and changing out the tires on it. Even had time to go see the son...and sit under his new awning.
Dex really helped him today as he was up at 2:00 a.m. and outta here by 4:30. He has another long day tomorrow. He couldn't make it without Tonto in the office. Tonto is his admin girl.
Well, you have probably heard enough out of me today. You would think I am on Dex. Please continue to be in prayer with Kenny's wife and family. I will keep you posted and GET READY FOR YOUR TEST. The labs have been looking good the last two weeks.
Good evening and Love -- Pepper
Friday, August 7, 2009
MM LOSS -- KENNY GRAY
Kanny and Mary Lynn were the very first people we met at a cancer party in Little Rock. We kept running into them at clinic, infusion and just around UAMS that last year. Kenny was always upbeat and had such a nice smile.
Mary Lynn was full of information for us about MM. Please read the below from our friend from OKC -- Ruthie and Rog. And please pray for these families
=======================================
Greetings:
I do not know if all of you had to opportunity to meet Kenny and Mary Lynn Gray.
Kenny had been a MM patient for several years and had enjoyed 1-2 years of remission.
His MM came back with a vengeance and was predominately in his head this last time. During his last visit the doctors put him on some kind of experimental drug and unfortunately nothing seemed to be working.
He was sent home in late June.
Mary Lynn called this morning to inform us that Kenny passed away at home (under hospice care). His funeral is scheduled for Saturday some time at Mountain Home, Arkansas.
If any of you should call you can let Mary know that we gave you the information.
While I am at it, there is some more bad news. The doctors sent Tommy Wells (wife, Brenda) home late last month after advising them that there was nothing more that could be done for him. The MM had also spread to Tommy’s brain. As posted by Roger in OKC
Mary Lynn was full of information for us about MM. Please read the below from our friend from OKC -- Ruthie and Rog. And please pray for these families
=======================================
Greetings:
I do not know if all of you had to opportunity to meet Kenny and Mary Lynn Gray.
Kenny had been a MM patient for several years and had enjoyed 1-2 years of remission.
His MM came back with a vengeance and was predominately in his head this last time. During his last visit the doctors put him on some kind of experimental drug and unfortunately nothing seemed to be working.
He was sent home in late June.
Mary Lynn called this morning to inform us that Kenny passed away at home (under hospice care). His funeral is scheduled for Saturday some time at Mountain Home, Arkansas.
If any of you should call you can let Mary know that we gave you the information.
While I am at it, there is some more bad news. The doctors sent Tommy Wells (wife, Brenda) home late last month after advising them that there was nothing more that could be done for him. The MM had also spread to Tommy’s brain. As posted by Roger in OKC
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Brio -- Word for the Day -- Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Brio
Definition: Enthusiastic vigor; vivacity; liveliness; spirit.
It has been so long since I have written that I was ashamed to go back to see what the actual date was. I haven't emailed my closest friends or called on the ones I usually call. Where has time gone?
Monday started the two week on, two week off cycle for ChemoSabe. Steroids this week and next week for four days.. He has been going to bed at 10:30-11:00 p.m. and getting up at 2:30 a.m. full of _____ and vinegar. Or, should I say he is full of brio.
He has had some worry about swelling and red varicose vein symptoms in his legs the last two weeks. A Doppler was Monday done to make certain he has no blood clots. I know I looked at him cross-eyed yesterday when he discussed it again. He was telling me that his legs had not swollen yesterday... WAKE UP CALL... I explained to him he had been working his hinny off the last two weeks. Instructing classes, traveling and standing on his feet, non-stop. When he got up this morning (2:30 a.m, remember) he woke me up and said his legs still weren't swollen or red... Hellllllloooo, you have been lying down.. Poor guy. The Dex is really doing a job on his poor brain!
To top off his steroids, Pete (our min-pin) was ailing pretty good from Saturday to Monday. Didn't eat, couldn't hold his ears up, limped, couldn't yawn or shake his head like dogs do. Took him to the vet on Monday... Strained leg muscles in small dogs (12 lb.) can cause problems with the whole body. So, what do you give a small HYPER dog with a strained muscle? Steroids... DEX... 5 mg daily. That is what ChemoSabe is taking, but four a day. So now I have a 12 lb. dog and a 212 lb. man in the house on steroids. Please pray for me!!!!
Tomorrow is our 22nd anniversary. It just doesn't seem possible. Money and material things have nothing in common with a healthy marriage. We were doing well last year and didn't need or want for anything. With our bikes, we were in heaven... Well, heck, we still are. But, the last year has proven love is true foundation of a relationship... I am lucky to have such a true friend in my husband.
I have struggled the last few weeks with the loss of my mother. There is a lady in the church where I work that has been diagnosed with cancer. Her daughter is about my age. I speak with the lady on a weekly basis. I hope I can be of some strength for her daughter. Today she was admitted to the hospital for a three day treatment of chemo. She will be doing this every three weeks until something changes.
It is pouring rain here right now. Has rained very day this week. ChemoSabe and I thought Sunday was a perfect time to ride as the sun was out and not a cloud in the sky. We headed out around 11:30 a.m. for a destination about 15 miles from the house to have lunch... We got about four miles away and the bottom fell out. We rode about another five miles and found a drive through at a church. We were drenched. I pulled out some dry denim shirts to put on over our wet t-shirts. It warmed us up a bit. We were there under shelter for about an hour.
The rain never really let up so we decided we needed to go from whence we came. Sprinkle...downpour...rain...sheets of rain...car wash rain... We drove like this for about five miles and found a service station with a small overhang, just so we could wipe our glasses off and regroup. No shelter.
I am a lotion freak. I lotion up every time I get out of the shower. Head-to-toe. Even if I shower three times a day from working in the yard and such... I was so wet that when I got off my bike seat there was lotion on the seat. It had soaked through my jeans... By golly, that is soaked!!!!
ChemoSabe looked me over, asked me if I was ready and away we went. I took in so much water through my lips I compared it to the bottle water we drink... Undoubtedly, when you are riding in the rain it is like drinking water from a bottle. Sweet, fresh and plentiful.
Trudging forward I could see the sun breaking through the clouds. We were about three miles from home.. Guess what? Streets were dry as the dessert. Came up the driveway and I looked over to my partner and said, "We beat the rain."... chuckle.
All is well in our life. We accept what the Lord has in store for us. We know he will take care of us. We are brio.
Ruthie and Rog have been in/out of town. They are driving to and from home in Okla. He is beginning the maintenance process.
We hope to be taking vacation soon. We haven't had a real one in over three years. Gosh, maybe longer. We want to get a lot done around the house and make a short trip. We are getting a new roof... I ordered green. Truly wanted the new metal roof, but thought about sliding down it if I ever have to get on it. I will keep you posted.
I will try to keep you up-to-date more often. Have you been studying?
Good night and Love -- Pepper
p.s. -- Almost forgot -- ChemoSabe has HAIR... A lot of black streaks and his eyebrows are black... HE NEEDS A HAIR CUT!!!
Definition: Enthusiastic vigor; vivacity; liveliness; spirit.
It has been so long since I have written that I was ashamed to go back to see what the actual date was. I haven't emailed my closest friends or called on the ones I usually call. Where has time gone?
Monday started the two week on, two week off cycle for ChemoSabe. Steroids this week and next week for four days.. He has been going to bed at 10:30-11:00 p.m. and getting up at 2:30 a.m. full of _____ and vinegar. Or, should I say he is full of brio.
He has had some worry about swelling and red varicose vein symptoms in his legs the last two weeks. A Doppler was Monday done to make certain he has no blood clots. I know I looked at him cross-eyed yesterday when he discussed it again. He was telling me that his legs had not swollen yesterday... WAKE UP CALL... I explained to him he had been working his hinny off the last two weeks. Instructing classes, traveling and standing on his feet, non-stop. When he got up this morning (2:30 a.m, remember) he woke me up and said his legs still weren't swollen or red... Hellllllloooo, you have been lying down.. Poor guy. The Dex is really doing a job on his poor brain!
To top off his steroids, Pete (our min-pin) was ailing pretty good from Saturday to Monday. Didn't eat, couldn't hold his ears up, limped, couldn't yawn or shake his head like dogs do. Took him to the vet on Monday... Strained leg muscles in small dogs (12 lb.) can cause problems with the whole body. So, what do you give a small HYPER dog with a strained muscle? Steroids... DEX... 5 mg daily. That is what ChemoSabe is taking, but four a day. So now I have a 12 lb. dog and a 212 lb. man in the house on steroids. Please pray for me!!!!
Tomorrow is our 22nd anniversary. It just doesn't seem possible. Money and material things have nothing in common with a healthy marriage. We were doing well last year and didn't need or want for anything. With our bikes, we were in heaven... Well, heck, we still are. But, the last year has proven love is true foundation of a relationship... I am lucky to have such a true friend in my husband.
I have struggled the last few weeks with the loss of my mother. There is a lady in the church where I work that has been diagnosed with cancer. Her daughter is about my age. I speak with the lady on a weekly basis. I hope I can be of some strength for her daughter. Today she was admitted to the hospital for a three day treatment of chemo. She will be doing this every three weeks until something changes.
It is pouring rain here right now. Has rained very day this week. ChemoSabe and I thought Sunday was a perfect time to ride as the sun was out and not a cloud in the sky. We headed out around 11:30 a.m. for a destination about 15 miles from the house to have lunch... We got about four miles away and the bottom fell out. We rode about another five miles and found a drive through at a church. We were drenched. I pulled out some dry denim shirts to put on over our wet t-shirts. It warmed us up a bit. We were there under shelter for about an hour.
The rain never really let up so we decided we needed to go from whence we came. Sprinkle...downpour...rain...sheets of rain...car wash rain... We drove like this for about five miles and found a service station with a small overhang, just so we could wipe our glasses off and regroup. No shelter.
I am a lotion freak. I lotion up every time I get out of the shower. Head-to-toe. Even if I shower three times a day from working in the yard and such... I was so wet that when I got off my bike seat there was lotion on the seat. It had soaked through my jeans... By golly, that is soaked!!!!
ChemoSabe looked me over, asked me if I was ready and away we went. I took in so much water through my lips I compared it to the bottle water we drink... Undoubtedly, when you are riding in the rain it is like drinking water from a bottle. Sweet, fresh and plentiful.
Trudging forward I could see the sun breaking through the clouds. We were about three miles from home.. Guess what? Streets were dry as the dessert. Came up the driveway and I looked over to my partner and said, "We beat the rain."... chuckle.
All is well in our life. We accept what the Lord has in store for us. We know he will take care of us. We are brio.
Ruthie and Rog have been in/out of town. They are driving to and from home in Okla. He is beginning the maintenance process.
We hope to be taking vacation soon. We haven't had a real one in over three years. Gosh, maybe longer. We want to get a lot done around the house and make a short trip. We are getting a new roof... I ordered green. Truly wanted the new metal roof, but thought about sliding down it if I ever have to get on it. I will keep you posted.
I will try to keep you up-to-date more often. Have you been studying?
Good night and Love -- Pepper
p.s. -- Almost forgot -- ChemoSabe has HAIR... A lot of black streaks and his eyebrows are black... HE NEEDS A HAIR CUT!!!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Cancer -- Word for the Day -- Thursday, July 23, 2009
Cancer
Definition:
a: malignant tumor of potentially unlimited growth that expands locally by invasion and systemically by metastasis b: an abnormal bodily state marked by such tumors
c: something evil or malignant that spreads destructively.
ChemoSabe has been living life to the fullest the last couple of weeks. He doesn't have labs or Velcade for two more weeks. Remember, the last time he had a break (four weeks ago) he got pneumonia. Cross your fingers.
He had a good 62nd birthday last week. He thought he was 61 until he spoke with his dad and thanked him for all the 61 years. His dad quickly corrected him. ChemoSabe told him his chemo thinking must have wanted him to forget about the last year and just erase it.
My boss (the pastor) fixed us a nice steak dinner last week on his birthday. This week the boss has a viral infection. I was very afraid ChemoSabe would get sick this week. But, he hasn't. We went to the lake with son and family last Saturday, ate fish buffet on Sunday and he has traveled all week. I really haven't seen or talked to him since night before last. He was up and out by 5:00 a.m. yesterday and didn't get home from Mississippi until 11:30 p.m. Then up and out again this morning by 6:30 a.m. He has a new job site beginning at 10:00 p.m. until 6:00 a.m. and then another appt. in the morning. AND, he ain't even on Dex (steroids) this week.
I am keeping up with him, though. I have been taking some new stuff that reduces fat in your system and cleanses the crud out of your colon. It is suppose to give you more energy. I have been on it a month and I keep telling my body to slow down and it just keeps on ticking. ChemoSabe asked me Tuesday night when I was in the floor cleaning out the kitchen cabinets if I had been sneaking into his Dex.
Last week I shampooed carpets in our bedroom, den, living room, back dining room and bathrooms (3). Friday I took the machine over to the son's and shampooed his living room and hallway. I may not lose any weight or inches, but I am getting a lot of house work done, so it is worth it. ha
Had Pete neutered last week and I think the doc injected him with some steroids, too. We think he is jumping higher and farther... He is a min-pin.
I met a MM cancer patient yesterday that is staying in one of the church's hospitality houses this week. He was diagnosed in 2003 and is in remission. He doesn't take any medications now. I just couldn't believe it. We talked for about 30 min. He is from Indiana. His name is Christian. He got into a fight with a deer and thought he had a pulled muscle. I believe that is the strangest story of diagnosis I have heard on the MM.
I have really missed my mother this week. I have cried on the way home just about every day, especially when I pass the nursing home. I really let it wail when I hear the song by Carrie Underwood, "I Told You So".... I think about all the times I was too big for my britches and thought I didn't need her. When I got a divorce and had to move back home. The times I thought I didn't have a few extra minutes to call to just say, "Hello". The times I did call and she told me how much those calls meant to her. She never once said, "I told you so."
ChemoSabe and I were going to catch a quick trip to Eureka, but I just don't believe we need to push his good health right now. The weather is going to be beautiful, but........ Cancer may be lurking. Don't want to push our luck. We are blessed.
Get ready for some tests coming up in the next couple of weeks. Study....look back.... you never know what I am going to ask you. Hey, an essay from you would be good. Let me think about the topic AND a prize.
Gotta go
Good Day and Love -- Pepper
Definition:
a: malignant tumor of potentially unlimited growth that expands locally by invasion and systemically by metastasis b: an abnormal bodily state marked by such tumors
c: something evil or malignant that spreads destructively.
ChemoSabe has been living life to the fullest the last couple of weeks. He doesn't have labs or Velcade for two more weeks. Remember, the last time he had a break (four weeks ago) he got pneumonia. Cross your fingers.
He had a good 62nd birthday last week. He thought he was 61 until he spoke with his dad and thanked him for all the 61 years. His dad quickly corrected him. ChemoSabe told him his chemo thinking must have wanted him to forget about the last year and just erase it.
My boss (the pastor) fixed us a nice steak dinner last week on his birthday. This week the boss has a viral infection. I was very afraid ChemoSabe would get sick this week. But, he hasn't. We went to the lake with son and family last Saturday, ate fish buffet on Sunday and he has traveled all week. I really haven't seen or talked to him since night before last. He was up and out by 5:00 a.m. yesterday and didn't get home from Mississippi until 11:30 p.m. Then up and out again this morning by 6:30 a.m. He has a new job site beginning at 10:00 p.m. until 6:00 a.m. and then another appt. in the morning. AND, he ain't even on Dex (steroids) this week.
I am keeping up with him, though. I have been taking some new stuff that reduces fat in your system and cleanses the crud out of your colon. It is suppose to give you more energy. I have been on it a month and I keep telling my body to slow down and it just keeps on ticking. ChemoSabe asked me Tuesday night when I was in the floor cleaning out the kitchen cabinets if I had been sneaking into his Dex.
Last week I shampooed carpets in our bedroom, den, living room, back dining room and bathrooms (3). Friday I took the machine over to the son's and shampooed his living room and hallway. I may not lose any weight or inches, but I am getting a lot of house work done, so it is worth it. ha
Had Pete neutered last week and I think the doc injected him with some steroids, too. We think he is jumping higher and farther... He is a min-pin.
I met a MM cancer patient yesterday that is staying in one of the church's hospitality houses this week. He was diagnosed in 2003 and is in remission. He doesn't take any medications now. I just couldn't believe it. We talked for about 30 min. He is from Indiana. His name is Christian. He got into a fight with a deer and thought he had a pulled muscle. I believe that is the strangest story of diagnosis I have heard on the MM.
I have really missed my mother this week. I have cried on the way home just about every day, especially when I pass the nursing home. I really let it wail when I hear the song by Carrie Underwood, "I Told You So".... I think about all the times I was too big for my britches and thought I didn't need her. When I got a divorce and had to move back home. The times I thought I didn't have a few extra minutes to call to just say, "Hello". The times I did call and she told me how much those calls meant to her. She never once said, "I told you so."
ChemoSabe and I were going to catch a quick trip to Eureka, but I just don't believe we need to push his good health right now. The weather is going to be beautiful, but........ Cancer may be lurking. Don't want to push our luck. We are blessed.
Get ready for some tests coming up in the next couple of weeks. Study....look back.... you never know what I am going to ask you. Hey, an essay from you would be good. Let me think about the topic AND a prize.
Gotta go
Good Day and Love -- Pepper
Monday, July 13, 2009
Retreat -- Word for the Day -- Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Retreat
Definition: 1: an act or process of withdrawing especially from what is difficult, dangerous, or disagreeable 2: the process of receding from a position or state attained 3: the usually forced withdrawal of troops from an enemy or from an advanced position 4: a place of privacy or safety refuge 5: a period of group withdrawal for prayer, meditation, study, or instruction under a director.
This may be too far back for you to remember (heck, I can't remember it myself).. Sharon and Mike (sister-in-law and brother) signed us up in December to go to a CARTI cancer survivor retreat at Petit Jean. Well, with my mom being ill and with Sharon having radiation treatments/chemo and then with ChemoSabe beginning his cycle again in January, we all had to reschedule. To make a long story short, ChemoSabe and I made the trip on Saturday and arrived at Petit Jean at 10:00 a.m. for check-in.
Let me back track a bit... ChemoSabe had his Velcade injections last Monday and Friday... CRP (crap) was down to less than 5 on Friday.... WHAT AN IMPROVEMENT! So, without the fatigue setting in and coming off the Dex on Friday, we decided to ride the bikes up to the retreat.
Parker did not have a stroke. He is having neuropathy, just like ChemoSabe's except his is from being a diabetic. Having Pete neutered on Tuesday.
Now, back to the retreat. We checked in at room registration and were instructed to go to a meeting room. BOOM!!! we walked into a room full of people and we were given a packet. Kinda like our first visit at UAMS Myelmoa clinic upon Orientation. We found a table with six other people...from L.R. and Quitman. I saw that look in ChemoSabe's face as we sat down. It was the same look I saw when we had to take a property tour at Disney World some years back.. He swore "NEVER AGAIN!".
We ate before starting. We were able to introduce ourselves and share our experiences along with the others. We ate. We watched a video and did a session on "Gifts" and "Challenges". We ate. We were dismissed to lunch... And we ate.
We broke up into groups of "Caregivers" and "Survivors". This I really liked. We got to share more. We ate. We were given free time from 5:00 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. and then We Ate dinner.
Our Fellowship time was the neatest and funniest time. We played "Not So Newlywed" game. I have always wanted to play this game. Fortunately, ChemoSabe and I were selected. I was thrilled... He wasn't so thrilled. BUT, we came in Second Place and laughed our booties off. The first place couple has been married for56 years. Afterward we stayed for the movie "Yes Man" with Jim Carrey and laughed our booties off more.
I ended up sleeping on the floor in our room. I am guessing all that laughing did something to the muscles in ChemoSabe's throat and he snored his bootie off. ha
We cannot tell you how much we enjoyed the meetings, the sharing, the crying, the information and the Eating... We learned so much from each individual we met. It brought back memories of the pain we endured when we discovered his cancer. It brought back the joy of the word "Remission". It brought back the fear and uncertainty. It reminded us we are not alone.
We learned of new cancers and treatments we were not aware of. Brain cancer, throat cancer, colon cancer, skin cancer, prostate cancer and rectal cancer. All these are treated by radiation. Which brings them to CARTI (Central Arkansas Radiation Treatment Institute). Unlike the MM patients, the CARTI patients are all from Arkansas. With MM we have met people from just about every state in the U.S. and some from outside the U.S.
We were able to share the type cancer that ChemoSabe has and the chemo treatments. We call it the liquid treatment. We soon discovered the CARTI patients do not take even the closest of the medications that we have.
The volunteers, employees and doctor were wonderful in their presentation and preparation for this retreat. It was truly an experience we are glad we did not cancel or walk out on when ChemoSabe had that look in his eye.
If you have not visited WinRock Farms to site see or stay at their facility, you are in for a treat. It is beautiful there. We never knew it was there all these years.
I wondered on the way home if there were any words of wisdom I could have or can share. I thought about my bike. Something I say to myself each time I ride and approach a curve. I never know what is on the other end of the curve. It was taught to me at my motorcycle course.
LOOK -- SLOW -- PUSH -- ROLL
LOOK way head of the curve -- wherever you look, that is where your bike takes you. If you look down or to the right, that is where you will go. So, look positively ahead of your illness. It will get you started in the right direction.
SLOW down and get your bearings about you. Plan your next step. Slow down your thinking. You are not in control, so just relax as if you are on an air mattress on the lake basking in the sun.
PUSH your handlebar. Push in the opposite direction of the way you want to go. This was a difficult one for me. If you push your handlebar to the left, for some reason your bike goes right. So, push forward with your illness. Sometimes it may seem you are headed in the wrong direction, but if you keep your focus on LOOK and SLOW, you will reach your goal.
ROLL -- means to increase your speed. My son always told me when I got to that curve to speed up. It would balance me out. I didn't want to increase my speed in a curve.. NO WAY! But...when I would go around the curve slowly I found my bike wobbling and choking. Sure enough, I trusted my bike when I increased my speed and it takes the curves wonderfully. So, when you set your sites on your illness, and slow down to plan your attack, then push ahead with your plan, increase your speed. Your motivation. Roll up your attitude, your feelings and your faith. It will increase your energy and make you more positive.
Thank you so much CARTI for the weekend. We wouldn't have wanted to do anything different.
Good day and Love -- Pepper
Definition: 1: an act or process of withdrawing especially from what is difficult, dangerous, or disagreeable 2: the process of receding from a position or state attained 3: the usually forced withdrawal of troops from an enemy or from an advanced position 4: a place of privacy or safety refuge 5: a period of group withdrawal for prayer, meditation, study, or instruction under a director.
This may be too far back for you to remember (heck, I can't remember it myself).. Sharon and Mike (sister-in-law and brother) signed us up in December to go to a CARTI cancer survivor retreat at Petit Jean. Well, with my mom being ill and with Sharon having radiation treatments/chemo and then with ChemoSabe beginning his cycle again in January, we all had to reschedule. To make a long story short, ChemoSabe and I made the trip on Saturday and arrived at Petit Jean at 10:00 a.m. for check-in.
Let me back track a bit... ChemoSabe had his Velcade injections last Monday and Friday... CRP (crap) was down to less than 5 on Friday.... WHAT AN IMPROVEMENT! So, without the fatigue setting in and coming off the Dex on Friday, we decided to ride the bikes up to the retreat.
Parker did not have a stroke. He is having neuropathy, just like ChemoSabe's except his is from being a diabetic. Having Pete neutered on Tuesday.
Now, back to the retreat. We checked in at room registration and were instructed to go to a meeting room. BOOM!!! we walked into a room full of people and we were given a packet. Kinda like our first visit at UAMS Myelmoa clinic upon Orientation. We found a table with six other people...from L.R. and Quitman. I saw that look in ChemoSabe's face as we sat down. It was the same look I saw when we had to take a property tour at Disney World some years back.. He swore "NEVER AGAIN!".
We ate before starting. We were able to introduce ourselves and share our experiences along with the others. We ate. We watched a video and did a session on "Gifts" and "Challenges". We ate. We were dismissed to lunch... And we ate.
We broke up into groups of "Caregivers" and "Survivors". This I really liked. We got to share more. We ate. We were given free time from 5:00 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. and then We Ate dinner.
Our Fellowship time was the neatest and funniest time. We played "Not So Newlywed" game. I have always wanted to play this game. Fortunately, ChemoSabe and I were selected. I was thrilled... He wasn't so thrilled. BUT, we came in Second Place and laughed our booties off. The first place couple has been married for56 years. Afterward we stayed for the movie "Yes Man" with Jim Carrey and laughed our booties off more.
I ended up sleeping on the floor in our room. I am guessing all that laughing did something to the muscles in ChemoSabe's throat and he snored his bootie off. ha
We cannot tell you how much we enjoyed the meetings, the sharing, the crying, the information and the Eating... We learned so much from each individual we met. It brought back memories of the pain we endured when we discovered his cancer. It brought back the joy of the word "Remission". It brought back the fear and uncertainty. It reminded us we are not alone.
We learned of new cancers and treatments we were not aware of. Brain cancer, throat cancer, colon cancer, skin cancer, prostate cancer and rectal cancer. All these are treated by radiation. Which brings them to CARTI (Central Arkansas Radiation Treatment Institute). Unlike the MM patients, the CARTI patients are all from Arkansas. With MM we have met people from just about every state in the U.S. and some from outside the U.S.
We were able to share the type cancer that ChemoSabe has and the chemo treatments. We call it the liquid treatment. We soon discovered the CARTI patients do not take even the closest of the medications that we have.
The volunteers, employees and doctor were wonderful in their presentation and preparation for this retreat. It was truly an experience we are glad we did not cancel or walk out on when ChemoSabe had that look in his eye.
If you have not visited WinRock Farms to site see or stay at their facility, you are in for a treat. It is beautiful there. We never knew it was there all these years.
I wondered on the way home if there were any words of wisdom I could have or can share. I thought about my bike. Something I say to myself each time I ride and approach a curve. I never know what is on the other end of the curve. It was taught to me at my motorcycle course.
LOOK -- SLOW -- PUSH -- ROLL
LOOK way head of the curve -- wherever you look, that is where your bike takes you. If you look down or to the right, that is where you will go. So, look positively ahead of your illness. It will get you started in the right direction.
SLOW down and get your bearings about you. Plan your next step. Slow down your thinking. You are not in control, so just relax as if you are on an air mattress on the lake basking in the sun.
PUSH your handlebar. Push in the opposite direction of the way you want to go. This was a difficult one for me. If you push your handlebar to the left, for some reason your bike goes right. So, push forward with your illness. Sometimes it may seem you are headed in the wrong direction, but if you keep your focus on LOOK and SLOW, you will reach your goal.
ROLL -- means to increase your speed. My son always told me when I got to that curve to speed up. It would balance me out. I didn't want to increase my speed in a curve.. NO WAY! But...when I would go around the curve slowly I found my bike wobbling and choking. Sure enough, I trusted my bike when I increased my speed and it takes the curves wonderfully. So, when you set your sites on your illness, and slow down to plan your attack, then push ahead with your plan, increase your speed. Your motivation. Roll up your attitude, your feelings and your faith. It will increase your energy and make you more positive.
Thank you so much CARTI for the weekend. We wouldn't have wanted to do anything different.
Good day and Love -- Pepper
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Schedule -- Word for the Day -- Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Schedule
Definition: a written or printed list, catalog, or inventory; also: timetable; program; especially: a procedural plan that indicates the time and sequence of each operation
We are back on schedule beginning today. The steroid (Dexamethasone) began today along with Velcade. Dex will be for four days this week and next week. Velcade will be today and Friday and then next Tuesday and next Friday. Let's hope this round isn't 'kick ass' like the last time.
Pneumonia is gone and the coughing is at almost nothing. He still looks puny to me, but he says he feels rather well. He has lost about 11 pounds, but he needed to. Wish I could.
His hair is about 1/4 inch now and it looks like it has more black than gray. His eyebrows are almost solid black. We will see as it progresses. He likes the bald look, but I think he is curious.
He helped my older brother and me work on my little brother's property over the weekend and then on ours a little on Saturday. We did some massive work at little brother's.
We have a special weekend planned at Petit Jean Mountain. Back in October, my little brother and Sharon signed us up with them to attend a cancer survivor retreat. They were very excited about going and the first scheduled date had to be canceled because of her treatments and ChemoSabe's and my mother's illness. Now, it is just CS and me. It will be bittersweet.
We think Parker (one of our kids) had a light stroke on Saturday. He is dragging his left front and hind leg. He can't put very much weight on his left side. He is one of the blind childs with diabetes. I am taking him in this afternoon for a check up and his shots along with Kipper.
I have also scheduled Pete and Maxie this week, but on different days. They are the largest and smallest of the group. Pete pesters Maxie too much so I can't take them together. I am seriously thinking about getting him neutered. I would like to breed him, but since he was a stray we don't have his papers.
I have really been missing my mom the last couple of weeks. I have to pass the nursing home to and from work and I just have to turn and look the other way. When I went to bed last night I cried. If I just had one more minute. I look at ChemoSabe and I am so thankful we were given the opportunity to fight.
We did get to ride a little over the weekend. We went to Hot Springs on Saturday and window shopped, then stopped at our little favorite spot by Hot Springs Village and grabbed a bite. When we came out we heard a roaring sound. We thought it was a small car with loud pipes. Then we heard it again. THUNDER! We looked at each other and laughed and then rode them like we stole them. Made it without a drop.
Sunday.... was a different story. We left the house headed for Heber Springs. It was sprinkling when we left the driveway. We got to the interstate (one mile from the house) and we were soaked to the bone. We went ahead to the service station for gas and sat out the storm. When we saw the 'all clear', we headed on down to the video store. Soaked again!..... Headed to the house for the afternoon.... Soaked again!!! But, what fun it was.
We have a long week scheduled into the weekend. Guess we are taking our 4th a week late.
Have a good week yourselves.
Good Day and Love -- Pepper
Definition: a written or printed list, catalog, or inventory; also: timetable; program; especially: a procedural plan that indicates the time and sequence of each operation
We are back on schedule beginning today. The steroid (Dexamethasone) began today along with Velcade. Dex will be for four days this week and next week. Velcade will be today and Friday and then next Tuesday and next Friday. Let's hope this round isn't 'kick ass' like the last time.
Pneumonia is gone and the coughing is at almost nothing. He still looks puny to me, but he says he feels rather well. He has lost about 11 pounds, but he needed to. Wish I could.
His hair is about 1/4 inch now and it looks like it has more black than gray. His eyebrows are almost solid black. We will see as it progresses. He likes the bald look, but I think he is curious.
He helped my older brother and me work on my little brother's property over the weekend and then on ours a little on Saturday. We did some massive work at little brother's.
We have a special weekend planned at Petit Jean Mountain. Back in October, my little brother and Sharon signed us up with them to attend a cancer survivor retreat. They were very excited about going and the first scheduled date had to be canceled because of her treatments and ChemoSabe's and my mother's illness. Now, it is just CS and me. It will be bittersweet.
We think Parker (one of our kids) had a light stroke on Saturday. He is dragging his left front and hind leg. He can't put very much weight on his left side. He is one of the blind childs with diabetes. I am taking him in this afternoon for a check up and his shots along with Kipper.
I have also scheduled Pete and Maxie this week, but on different days. They are the largest and smallest of the group. Pete pesters Maxie too much so I can't take them together. I am seriously thinking about getting him neutered. I would like to breed him, but since he was a stray we don't have his papers.
I have really been missing my mom the last couple of weeks. I have to pass the nursing home to and from work and I just have to turn and look the other way. When I went to bed last night I cried. If I just had one more minute. I look at ChemoSabe and I am so thankful we were given the opportunity to fight.
We did get to ride a little over the weekend. We went to Hot Springs on Saturday and window shopped, then stopped at our little favorite spot by Hot Springs Village and grabbed a bite. When we came out we heard a roaring sound. We thought it was a small car with loud pipes. Then we heard it again. THUNDER! We looked at each other and laughed and then rode them like we stole them. Made it without a drop.
Sunday.... was a different story. We left the house headed for Heber Springs. It was sprinkling when we left the driveway. We got to the interstate (one mile from the house) and we were soaked to the bone. We went ahead to the service station for gas and sat out the storm. When we saw the 'all clear', we headed on down to the video store. Soaked again!..... Headed to the house for the afternoon.... Soaked again!!! But, what fun it was.
We have a long week scheduled into the weekend. Guess we are taking our 4th a week late.
Have a good week yourselves.
Good Day and Love -- Pepper
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