Persevere -- Word for the Day -- Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Persevere

DEFINITION: (verb) to continue despite difficulties

My very first posting on ChemoSabe's journey was: Persevere -- April 13, 2008 -- Dreaded Visit and here we are again. Not even a year and I am dreading next week. We begin on Sunday with an MRI, then the bone marrow biopsy on Tuesday, doctor's visit Wednesday and the dreaded port insert on Thursday.

I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS!!!! Hell, who am I? It's ChemoSabe that will be going through it.

I remember having to go to the dentist A LOT when I was growing up and throughout my early adult years. At times I was going once a week. It would seem the visits would get easier, but not for me. They got harder. I would suspect ChemoSabe is the same way, although we haven't discussed it.

We will be discontinuing the Thalidomide (chemo by mouth) today and the Lovenox (blood thinner). He is happy about both. I am certain he will start a new regimen of pills at different doses. He has had so many I can't remember. I should be taking the test and not you -- Right?

He is extremely healthy now. Has gained a few pounds. Trying to keep up with me, I suppose. He doesn't get tired and seems to have enough energy to complete any task. We do relax a lot on the weekends by having our movie marathons. Somehow we do keep the house in order and the kids clean.

He is consumed in work and I know he doesn't look forward to any interferences with his schedule. His work is his life. No, he doesn't put it before me, but....

It will be a difficult time in time management for me because of my mother. She has become to expect me daily. I have reduced my visits for her acclamation and she is doing well as far as independence, but she can't seem to do without me more than one day. Please pray for my stress level during that time when I am trying to get by for her, trying to get home to ChemoSabe and trying to work, along with the home chores. It does sound like I am feeling sorry for myself, but I truly am not. Challenge, as with 2008, is my middle name.

What a year it has been!!!!! Who would have thought we would have had these trials. I believe I am stronger for it. ChemoSabe is definitely stronger physically, mentally and spiritually. He continues to outrun his competition.

We did have lab today, but we do not have the results, so I will keep you posted. At the risk of rambling, I will close and followup, hopefully before year end!

We will persevere!

As always and Love -- Pepper